Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: Vol 775 - Feb. 22, 2009

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

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Strange Quotes - "Classic Writing"

What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset. - Crowfoot, Blackfoot warrior and orator, 1890

Hold on to your divine blush, your innate rosy magic, or end up brown. Once you're brown, you'll find out you're blue. As blue as indigo. And you know what that means. Indigo. Indigoing. Indigone. - Tom Robbins

When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that exalted, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part. - George Bernard Shaw "Getting Married" (1908)

Strange Quotes About Parents

Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them. - Rita Rudner

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. - Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980)

The thing that impresses me the most about America is the way parents obey their children. - King Edward VIII (1894 - 1972)

The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children. - Clarence Darrow (1857 - 1938)

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Southern Expressions

Southern Expressions

Exclamations:
"Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!"
"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit."

Threats:
"I'll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outtastyle."
"This'll jar your preserves."
"Don't you be makin' me open a can o' whoop-ass on ya!"

Good Things/Compliments:
"Cute as a sack full of puppies."
"If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it."
"Gooder than grits."

The Weather:
"It's so dry, the trees are bribing the dogs."
"It's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepper patch."
Wintry roads are said to be "slicker than otter snot."

Descriptions:
A bothersome person is "like a booger that you can't thump off."
When something is bad then you say, "that ain't no count."
If something is hard to do, it's "like trying to herd cats."
"He ran like his feet was on fire and his ass was catchin."
A hectic schedule keeps you "Busier than a cat covering crap on a
marble floor."

Insults:
"She's uglier than homemade soap."
"Your momma's so fat, when she stepped up on the scale to be weighed, it said 'To be continued.'"
"He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down."
"Uglier than a lard bucket full of armpits."
"The wheels still turning, but the hamsters dead"
Any insulting statement is always followed by "bless his/her heart."
Example: "She's dumber than a door knob, bless her heart."

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Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Sonntag, 22. Februar 2009

Vol 775 - Feb. 22, 2009 - Strange Southern Expressions

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