Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: 2015

Dienstag, 29. Dezember 2015

VOL 1491 - DEC. 30, 2015 - New Year's Resolutions for Pets

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

Happy New Year!

A Few New Years Eve Toasts for you and your pals!

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The Lord gives our relatives,
Thank God we can choose our friends.

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Here's to a long life and a merry one
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer and another one!

May you never lie, cheat, or drink.
But if you must lie, lie in each other's arms.
If you must cheat, cheat death.
And if you must drink, drink with all of us
because we love you.

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May we live to learn well, and learn to live well.
May you live as long as you want,
and never want as long as you live.

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

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Strange "Father Time" Quotes:

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. - Hector Berlioz

Being rich is having money; being wealthy is having time. - Margaret Bonnano

Time is the substance from which I am made. Time is a river which carries me along, but I am the river; it is a tiger that devours me, but I am the tiger; it is a fire that consumes me, but I am the fire. - Jorge Louis Borges

Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them. - Dion Boucicault

Oh Time! the beautifier of the dead, adorer of the ruin, comforter and only healer when the heart hath bled... Time, the avenger! - Lord Byron

One life - a little gleam of Time between two Eternities. - Thomas Carlyle

Take care of the minutes, for the hours will take care of themselves. - Lord Chesterfield

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - New Year's Resolutions for Pets

New Year's Resolutions for Pets

1. Have a torrid one-night stand with a street mutt.

2. I will no longer be beholden to the sound of the can opener.

3. Circulate petition that Leg Humping be a juried competition in major dog shows.

4. Call PETA and tell them what that surgical mask-wearing freak does to us when no one is around.

5. Take time from busy schedule to stop and smell the behinds.

6. Hamster: Don't let them figure out I'm just a rat on 'roids, or they'll flush my butt.

7. Grow opposable thumb; break into pantry; decide for MYSELF how much food is *too* much.

8. Get out of the castle more, maybe swim counter-clockwise this year.

9. January 1st: Kill the sock! Must kill the sock! January 2nd - December 31: Re-live victory over the sock.

10. I will NOT chase the damned stick unless I see it LEAVE HIS HAND.

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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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POLITICAL MESSAGE ON REAR OF SEWAGE TRUCK - CONTAINS POLITICAL PROMISES! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/197698.html

STRANGE BIZ VEHICLE CONVERSIONS - SCHOOL BUS CHOPPED OFF TO BECOME A LOGGING HAULER! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/197711.html

WOW! - AMAZING BACK-FLIP ON 4 INCH BALANCE BEAM! - DANGEROUS GYMNASTIC FEATS! - CRAZY ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/197713.html

STRANGE AND STUPID FELONS - MAN DIES AFTER BLOWING UP CONDOM VENDING MACHINE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197718.html

SEMI TRUCK DRIVER LEARNS WHY WEIGH LIMITS SIGNS ON OLD BRIDGES ARE IMPORTANT! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/197722.html

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2016 - SAND SCULPTURE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197723.html

WORST CELEBRITY BEACH BODIES - GEMMA COLLINS - SCARY - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197361.html

COP FUN - ATTEMPTED BEER THEFT FAIL - MAN GRABS CASE OF BEER AND TRIPPED UP BY EMPLOYEE! - FUNNY ACTION GIF - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/197654.html

STRANGE HUNTING FUN - CHRISTMAS TREE MADE FROM DEER HEADS WITH ANTLERS CREATES THE PROPER MOOD AT THE HUNTING LODGE! - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/197655.html

STRANGE SOCIAL MEDIA ITEMS - FACEBOOK BARBIE - THE REAL BARBIE AND THEN THE PROFILE PICTURE POSTED! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197709.html

STRANGE ARCHAEOLOGICAL DISCOVERIES - HUGE UNFINISHED OBELISK CARVED IN GRANITE - EGYPT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197715.html

STRANGE RICH PEOPLE CHRISTMAS GIFTS - GOLD PLATED SUGAR CUBES $120.00! - IN THE GOLD BOX - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197579.html

1979 ISLAMIC REVOLUTION IN IRAN - THOUSANDS OF WOMEN PROTEST FORCED HIJAB WEARING! - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/197689.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS FUN - NOW THOSE ARE TREE LIGHTS! - MILLIONS! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/197710.html

STRANGE FOOD FUN - WACKY HEAD HELMET MOUNTED CEREAL BOX DIGGER SCOOPS FROM BOX AND ADDS MILK! STRANGE ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197712.html

STRANGE AIRCRAFT - HUGE BELUGA AIRBUS TRANSPORTS UNFINISHED AIRBUS AIRCRAFT FRONTS - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/197721.html

CELEBRITY FUN - LEONARDO DECAPRIO FINALLY GETS RECOGNIZED AT THE OSCARS! BEARLY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197724.html

STEVE HARVEY - MISS UNIVERSE SCREW-UP - BLOWS CHRISTMAS WISH - MERRY EASTER! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197725.html

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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SV - DAY TRIPS - STRANGE DESTINATIONS - BRIDGES - MOTELS - TOURIST SPOTS - GAS STATIONS - JUNK YARDS - DEALERSHIPS - PARKING LOTS

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/100726_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Strange Facts and Figures About Death! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197380.html

- Santa Downsizing - Christmas Cutbacks - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197717.html

- New Years History - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/159171.html

- New Years Resolutions For Internet Junkies - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/23769.html

- New Years Eve Hangover Cures - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/25283.html

- Strange But Pithy Sayings - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/186254.html

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The Featured New Category This Week - SV - DAY TRIPS - STRANGE DESTINATIONS - BRIDGES - MOTELS - TOURIST SPOTS - GAS STATIONS - JUNK YARDS - DEALERSHIPS - PARKING LOTS

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/119_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

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Samstag, 26. Dezember 2015

VOL 1490 - DEC. 27, 2015 - 10 Hilarious Cover Letter Blunders

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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CHRISTMAS WEEK FUN !

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

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Strange Quotes About 'Attitude'

Eccentricity is not, as dull people would have us believe, a form of madness. It is often a kind of innocent pride, and the man of genius and the aristocrat are frequently regarded as eccentrics because genius and aristocrat are entirely unafraid of and uninfluenced by the opinions and vagaries of the crowd. - Edith Sitwell (1887 - 1964), Taken Care Of ,1965

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. - Herm Albright (1876 - 1944)

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. - James Branch Cabell (1879 - 1958), The Silver Stallion, 1926

The point of living and of being an optimist, is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come. - Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)

Getting ahead in a difficult profession requires avid faith in yourself. That is why some people with mediocre talent, but with great inner drive, go much further than people with vastly superior talent. - Sophia Loren (1934 - )

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - 10 Hilarious Cover Letter Blunders

These are actual examples of job search stupidity provided by a friend of ours who's a professional recruiter. Some of the specifics have been changed to protect the inept, but they're proof positive that the economy isn't solely to blame for today's horrendous employment statistics.

"If I could use one word to describe myself, it would be Team Player."

"My resume speaks for itself so I will not burden you with words."

"I have organized and conducted community service and missionary positions."

"I work an additional 10-15 minutes per week to perform administrative responsibilities promptly and accurately."

"I am interested in the Financial Analyst position. I currently work at Rusty's Camper Emporium as the parking attendant."

"I have attended Champions School of Real Estate, because I am a champion."

"I can think and act simultaneously under intense pressure."

"I am known and respected in New York City and surrounding area."

"Although my grades are not the highest, I possess the ability to grasp difficult concepts rather quickly most of the time."

"I am looking forward to further discussing my qualifications and how I can be an asset to your company. Please contact me at bigassbooty@ifailmail.com anytime."

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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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STRANGE MAIL BOXES - TWISTED TREE - BEST DESIGN EVER! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197634.html

AMAZING WOOD PILE - TALENTED GUY CREATED A HUGE FISH! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197635.html

STRANGE BEAUTY PAGEANT OUTFITS - CHECK OUT MISS USA'S CRAZY RED WHITE & BLUE ANGEL WINGS AT THE MISS UNIVERSE CONTEST! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197636.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS FUN - FIND THE PANDA AMONG ALL THE SNOWMEN - HUNGARIAN ARTIST GERGELY DUDAS CREATED! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197637.html

WORST CELEBRITY BEACH BODIES - ADAM SANDLER - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197360.html

AMAZING ANIMAL ACTION PIXS - A WHOLE COLONY OF ANTS TEAM UP TO CARRY AND DRAG BY HUMAN LIKE ANT CHAINS HUGE FOOD ITEM TO THEIR HOME! - AMAZING ACTION GIF - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197615.html

STRANGE PICTURES - IS THIS PICKUP TRUCK REALLY TOWING THIS ICE BOUND SHIP? - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/197639.html

REALLY COOL OLDE TRUCKS - FLATBED FORD TRUCK WITH TRAILER HITCH BAR STOOLS AND BEER KEG TAPS! - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/197641.html

STRANGE OLDE CELEBRITIES - CHARLES MANSON MURDER VICTIM SHARON TATE IN A BIKINI 1968 AT THE CANNES FILM FESTIVALE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197640.html

FARM FUN - GOT EXTRA LOGS? MAKE A KIDS PLAYHOUSE BULLDOZER OUT OF THEM! - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/197644.html

STRANGE FARM FUN - GOOFY CHRISTMAS PACKAGING OF PS4 FARM SIMULATOR GAME WITH FRESH HEAD OF CABBAGE AND A CARROT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197646.html

COOL PICTURES - GREAT SHOT TO A DESERT TRAVELER WITH BEAUTIFUL WHITE HORSE AND COLORFUL SADDLE - PERFECT LIGHTING! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197647.html

STRANGE RUSSIAN HOT RODS! GAZ-M20 POBEDA HOT ROD - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/197643.html

STRANGE ANIMALS - COOL ALL BLACK LION - REVERSE ALBINISM - MELANISM - AMAZING ! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197648.html

STRANGE MUSTACHE CONTEST WINNER - MOST UNIQUE! - SQUARES IN A CIRCLE WITH MATCHING SPECTACLES ! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197649.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS 2015 FUN - GINGERBREAD STAR WARS MILLENNIUM FALCON SPACE SHIP FOLLOWED BY TIE FIGHTERS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197650.html

2015 CHRISTMAS FUN - POLICE BLOCK ENTRANCE TO MALL OF AMERICA IN MINNEAPOLIS TO PREVENT PROTESTERS FROM BLOCKING SHOPPERS - STRANGE XMAS FUN! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/197651.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - FIREMAN'S OUTSIDE XMAS LIGHTS SHOW FIREMEN HOSING DOWN BURNING HOUSE AND CLIMBING LIT LADDER! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/197652.html

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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SF - G - INTERNATIONAL FARMS - FOREIGN FARMS - CROPS - ASIA - EUROPE

http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/100750_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Gunfight Rules That Will Save You and Your Family - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197384.html

- Illegal Migrants From Somalia Living In Free Italian Villa Demanding Free Wi-Fi and Free House Cleaning Services - http://www.strangepolitcis.com/content/item/197632.html

- 8 Strange Drive-Thru Services Around The World - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/175994.html

- Strange Breast and Bra Facts - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/176528.html

- Strange Inventors and Inventions - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/175332.html

- 10 Least Tourist-Friendly Countries - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/175993.html

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The Featured New Category This Week - SF - G - INTERNATIONAL FARMS - FOREIGN FARMS - CROPS - ASIA - EUROPE

http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/102_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

Please Click here to begin following: https://twitter.com/headstranger
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Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

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Dienstag, 22. Dezember 2015

VOL 1489 - DEC. 23, 2015 - Strange Christmas Facts

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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CHRISTMAS FUN !

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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------------------------

==================================

Strange Quotes About Santa:

Let me see if I've got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn't laundering illegal drug money? - Tom Armstrong

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple Black

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year. - Victor Borge

Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking? - Arlo Guthrie

I played Santa Claus many times, and if you don't believe it, check out the divorce settlements awarded my wives. - Groucho Marx "The Groucho Phile"

Christmas "Quotes"

"Do give books - religious or otherwise - for Christmas. They're never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal." - Lenore Hershey

"Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit." - Kin Hubbard

"A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together." - Garrison Keillor

"Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year." - P. J. O'Rourke

"Merry Christmas, Nearly Everybody!" - Ogden Nash

For the Christmas season remember: Alcohol does not make you FAT - it makes you LEAN....
--- against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Strange Christmas Facts

Xmas Facts

Saint Nicholas of Myra, the original Santa Claus, was the patron saint of children, thieves and pawnbrokers.

Based on previous surveys, 17 percent of you will embarrass yourselves in some way at your office Christmas party.

A Mongolian wild ass can run 8 mph faster than a reindeer.

It's Donder, not Donner.

Christmas pudding should be stirred from east to west.

56 percent of Americans sing holiday carols to their pets.

53 percent of Americans plan to "re-gift" this year.

1 in 3 men will wait until Christmas Eve to finish their shopping.

1 in 6 men would like to get rid of all the "gift-giving nonsense."

A traditional Christmas dinner in early England was the head of a pig prepared with mustard.

On Christmas Eve in 2001, the Bethlehem Hotel had 208 of its 210 rooms free.

It's "God rest ye merry, gentlemen," not "God rest ye, merry gentlemen."

There are 1.76 billion candy canes produced every year.

Kris Kringel, a man in his 40s, lives in North Pole, Alaska, and delivers pizzas for a living. He drives a 1984 Ford Tempo.

Based on a 1999 estimated population count of North America and Europe, on Christmas Eve of that year Santa Claus had to visit 42,466,666 homes in a 12-hour period -- that's 983 homes per second.

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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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STRANGE MIDDLE EAST ITEMS - FIRST WOMAN DRIVER IN KABUL AFGHANISTAN - RUNS INTO A MERCHANT PILE OF WARES WHILE PROUD REPORTER CATCHES IT LIVE! - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/197620.html

WORST CELEBRITY BEACH BODIES - TARA REED - SCARY! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197359.html

AMAZING AERIAL PIX OF 2 WHALES SWIMMING THROUGH A HUGE SCHOOL OF FISH! WOW! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197613.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - BARROOM TREAT - SANTA BOOTS FILLED WITH BEER! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197614.html

STRANGE SPORTS PIXS- HOW DOES THIS ONE LEGGED RUNNER DO IT? - ODD PICTURE ANGLE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197616.html

STRANGE MILITARY SOLDIERS - HOT KURDISH WOMAN FIGHTING ISIS TERRORISTS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197617.html

STRANGE MILITARY FUN - THE ULTIMATE UNIT PHOTO WITH ACTUAL PHOTO BOMB - REAL BOMB! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197618.html

COOL STAR WARS PICTURES - 1977 PEOPLE LINED UP TO SEE THE ORIGINAL ! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197619.html

STRANGE DEATH RELATED ITEMS - CHINA IS TRYING TO BREAK THE RECENT HABIT OF MEN HIRING FUNERAL STRIPPERS TO ATTRACT MORE PEOPLE TO THE FUNERAL! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197627.html

AMAZING VEHICLES ACCESSORIES - UNIQUE UNDER BUMPER SWING OUT TRAILER HITCH - JUST PUSH THE BUTTON! ACTION GIF - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197621.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - OVER THE TOP OUTDOOR CHRISTMAS DECORATING! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/197628.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - WILD CHRISTMAS TREE OUTFIT FOR MOM! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/197630.html

LAS VEGAS TERROR DRIVER LAKEISHA HALLOWAY SCREAMS :ALLAHU AKBAR" AS SHE DRIVES OVER PEOPLE ON TH SIDEWALK! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197622.html

NFL SPORTS FUN - HOT SANTA CHEER-LEADING OUTFITS - WOW! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197629.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - THESE SPECIAL GUNS TO KILL ZOMBIES SHOULD HELP JUNIOR ENJOY THE CHRISTMAS SEASON! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197631.html

COPS ARREST MAN WITH F*#K COPS TATTOOED ON FOREHEAD! - DUH! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197623.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - A CHRISTMAS TREE FROM THE DARK SIDE - DARTH VADER TREE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197624.html

2015 MISS UNIVERSE PAGEANT DISASTER - WATCH THEM TAKE THE WINNING CROWN OFF MISS COLUMBIA AFTER MORON ANNOUNCER SCREWED UP WINNER MISS PHILIPPINES! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197626.html

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The Featured Pix Category This Week - HOLIDAYS - Christmas - Halloween - Thanksgiving

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/15_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Senior Wisdom - God's Plan For Aging - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197466.html

- 12 Things You Might Not Know About the Movie 'A Christmas Story' - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/145674.html

- Christmas Italian Style - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/127893.html

- The Strange History of a Popular Christmas Carol - The 12 Days of Christmas! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/158418.html

- T'was the Month Before Christmas - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/170746.html

- Strange But Funny Christmas Holiday Eating Tips - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/171228.html

- Do You HATE Those 'Stupid" Christmas Letters? Read On..... - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/121338.html

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The Featured New Category This Week - HOLIDAYS - Christmas - Halloween - Thanksgiving

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/121_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

Please Click here to begin following: https://twitter.com/headstranger
https://www.facebook.com/pages/StrangeCosmoscom/278654660263

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Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

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Samstag, 19. Dezember 2015

VOL 1488 - DEC. 20, 2015 - A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

---------------------------------------

DECEMBER FUN !

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

------------------------

==================================

Strange Christmas Quotes

"Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want-and their kids pay for it." - Rixhard Lamm

"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up -- they have no holidays." Henny Youngman

"Christmas and Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Football Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence." Erma Bombeck

Strange Quotes about Cats & Teenagers:

For all of you with teenagers or who had teenagers, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats:

1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

4. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

5. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - - A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

Twas the night before Christmas and Santa's a wreck...
How to live in a world that's politically correct?
His workers no longer would answer to "Elves",
"Vertically Challenged" they were calling themselves.
And labor conditions at the North Pole,
were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul.

Four reindeer had vanished without much propriety,
released to the wilds, by the Humane Society.
And equal employment had made it quite clear,
that Santa had better not use just reindeer.
So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid,
were replaced with 4 pigs, and you know that looked stupid!

The runners had been removed from his beautiful sleigh,
because the ruts were deemed dangerous by the EPA,
And millions of people were calling the Cops,
when they heard sled noises upon their roof tops.
Second-hand smoke from his pipe, had his workers quite frightened,
and his fur trimmed red suit was called "unenlightened".

To show you the strangeness of today's ebbs and flows,
Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose.
He went to Geraldo, in front of the Nation,
demanding millions in over-due workers compensation.

So...half of the reindeer were gone, and his wife
who suddenly said she'd had enough of this life,
joined a self help group, packed and left in a whiz,
demanding from now on that her title was Ms.

And as for gifts...why, he'd never had the notion
that making a choice could cause such commotion.
Nothing of leather, nothing of fur...
Which meant nothing for him or nothing for her.
Nothing to aim, Nothing to shoot,
Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.
Nothing for just girls and nothing for just boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific,
Nothing that's warlike or non-pacifistic.

No candy or sweets...they were bad for the tooth.
Nothing that seemed to embellish upon the truth.
And fairy tales...while not yet forbidden,
were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden,
for they raised the hackles of those psychological,
who claimed the only good gift was one ecological.

No baseball, no football...someone might get hurt,
besides - playing sports exposed kids to dirt.
Dolls were said to be sexist and should be passe.
and Nintendo would rot your entire brain away.

So Santa just stood there, disheveled and perplexed,
he just couldn't figure out what to do next?
He tried to be merry he tried to be gay,
but you must have to admit he was having a very bad day.
His sack was quite empty, it was flat on the ground,
nothing fully acceptable was anywhere to be found.

Something special was needed, a gift that he might,
give to us all, without angering the left or the right.
A gift that would satisfy - with no indecision,
each group of people in every religion.
Every race, every hue,
everyone, everywhere...even you!
So here is that gift, it's price beyond worth...

"MAY YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES, ENJOY PEACE ON EARTH"

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

=================================

STRANGE ART AROUND THE WORLD - AMAZING 66,000 WATER-CUPS FILLED DIFFERENT SHADES CREATE HUGE BABY ARTWORK! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197573.html

STRANGE BUSINESS SIGNS - PERFECT LOCATION FOR LIQUOR STORE - NEXT TO DIVORCE AND BANKRUPTCY SHOPS - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/197574.html

STRANGE CELEBRITIES- WINNIE COOPER FROM "THE WONDER YEARS" AT AGE 40! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197576.html

STRANGE POLICE STORIES - CROSS-EYED MAN ARRESTED FOR STRANGLING GIRLFRIEND FOR NOT MAKING EYE CONTACT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197567.html

ROAD TEST DANGERS - AUTO MAGAZINE EDITOR TEST DRIVE 800 HP LAMBORGHINI HURACAN ALMOST TOTALS WHEN SUV DRAGGING A HUGE TREE APPEARS ON MTN CURVE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197577.html

STRANGE RICH PEOPLE CHRISTMAS GIFTS - GOLD PLATED SUGAR CUBES $120.00! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197578.html

GYMNAST VAULT FAILS - STRANGE GUYS TRIES THE VAULT 3 TIMES - FAILS BADLY ALL 3 - OUCH - PAINFUL ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197568.html

COOL MILITARY CHRISTMAS TREE - RED WHITE AND BLUE WITH EAGLE ON TOP! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197580.html

STRANGE OLDE CARS - 1939 PONTIAC GHOST CAR - SEE THRU PLEXIGLAS SEDAN! - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/197569.html

STRANGE RELIGIOUS ITEMS - WHY WOULD AMISH GIRLS HAVE SHOPPING CARTS FULL OF CHEETOS? - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/197581.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - PICKUP TRUCK COVERED WITH CHRISTMAS LIGHTS - LIL' TREE IN BACK! COOL HOLIDAY FUN! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197582.html

TIMING IS EVERYTHING - A SPECIAL FLOWER FOR HIS FAVORITE GIRL AS SHE STEPS OUT OF THE PORT-O-JOHN - THAT FRESHLY WASHED FEELING! - MORONS OR THE WORLD UNITE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197583.html

FIRST CHRISTMAS TREE? - I THINK YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG - HUGE TREE ATOP CAR - ROOTS AND ALL! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197584.html

STRANGE EDUCATION FUN - CLEVER TEACHER WEARS THE SAME SHIRT & SWEATER 40 YEARS OF CLASS PICTURES! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197585.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS CARDS - HORRIFIED KITTY IS NOT ENJOYING THIS CHRISTMAS CARD WITH THE TREE! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/197586.html

SPORTS FUN - AMAZING NBA HOOP LEVEL VIEW OF BLOCKED SHOT!- WOW! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197572.html

OHIO BAKERY POSTS NON PC SIGN - DON'T LIKE IT? GET OUT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197262.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SV - CONCEPT CARS - WILD DESIGNS - GM - FORD - CHRYSLER - JAPANESE - EUROPEAN

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/100707_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Japan - Interesting Facts About The Culture - NO Muslims Allowed - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197434.html

- The Top 15 Forgotten Olde Tyme Christmas Carols - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/22455.html

- Horrible Holiday Puns - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/25243.html

- Dog Rules For Christmas - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/25262.html

- A Whole Bunch of Christmas Quickies! - http://www.strangevacations.com/content/item/23704.html

- Never Underestimate the Impression You Will Leave On Others - (This Will Bring a Tear To Your Eye) - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/180080.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SV - CONCEPT CARS - WILD DESIGNS - GM - FORD - CHRYSLER - JAPANESE - EUROPEAN

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/113_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

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Dienstag, 15. Dezember 2015

VOL 1487 - DEC. 16, 2015 - Christmas Quiz - Can you Name These Carols?

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

---------------------------------------

DECEMBER FUN !

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

------------------------

==================================

Quotes of the Day -

"No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office." - Covert Bailey

"If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people." - Jim Eason

"A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car." - Carrie Snow

"A waist is a terrible thing to mind." - Ziggy (Tom Wilson)

"I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine."- Rita Rudner

"Those in the cheaper seats clap. The rest of you rattle your jewelry."- John Lennon (1940 - 1980)

"The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other." --Ronald Reagan

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Christmas Quiz - Can you Name These Carols?

1. Oh, member of the round table with missing areas

2. Boulder of the tinkling metal spheres

3. Vehicular homicide was committed on Dad's mom by a precipitous darling

4. Wanted in December: top forward incisors

5. The apartment of two psychiatrists

6. The lad is a diminutive percussionist

7. Sir Lancelot with laryngitis

8. Decorate the entryways

9. Cup-shaped instruments fashioned of a whitish metallic element

10. Oh small Israel urban center

11. Far off in a haybin

12. We are Kong, Lear, and Nat Cole

13. Duodecimal enumeration of the passage of the yuletide season

14. Leave and broadcast from an elevation

15. Our fervent hope is that you thoroughly enjoy your yuletide season

16. Listen, the winged heavenly messengers are proclaiming tunefully

17. As the guardians of the woolly animals protected their charges in the dark hours

18. I beheld a trio of nautical vessels moving in this direction

19. Jubilation to the entire terrestrial globe

20. Do you perceive the same vibrations which stimulate my auditory sense organ?

21. A joyful song of reverence relative to hollow metallic vessels which vibrate and bring forth a ringing sound when struck

22. Parent was observed osculating a red-coated unshaven teamster

23. May the Deity bestow an absence of fatigue to mild male humans

24. Rose-colored uncouth dolf is aware of the nature of precipitation, darling

Answers

1. Oh Holy Night

2. Jingle Bell Rock

3. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer

4. All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth

5. The Nutcracker Suite

6. Little Drummer Boy

7. Silent Night

8. Deck the Halls

9. Silver Bells

10. Oh Little Town of Bethlehem

11. Away in a Manger

12. We Three Kings

13. The Twelve Days of Christmas

14. Go Tell It on the Mountain

15. We Wish You a Merry Christmas

16. Hark the Herald Angels Sing

17. While the Shepherds Guarded Their Flocks By Night

18. I Saw Three Ships

19. Joy to the World

20. Do You Hear What I Hear?

21. Carol of the Bells

22. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

23. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

24. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

WORST CELEBRITY BEACH BODIES - MARIAH CAREY - THE FAT WET SUIT LOOK! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197358.html

FATHER OF THE YEAR NOMINEE - DAD SLIDES DOWN THE SWIMMING POOL SLIDE FLIPS KID UPSIDE DOWN INTO POOL! - CRAZY ACTION GIF - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197114.html

STRANGE DEATH - IRONIC ELECTROCUTION OF PRISONER WHOSE SENTENCE OF DEATH BY ELECTROCUTION WAS REDUCED! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197558.html

CHRISTMAS FUN - THE CANADIAN PACIFIC RAILWAY SURE KNOWS HOW TO CELEBRATE - COMPLETE TRAIN DECORATED! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/197559.html

TODAY'S SCARY SHELTERED PC WORLD - 1944 - 18 YR OLDS STORMED THE BEACHES OF NORMANDY - TODAY - THEY NEED A "SAFE SPACE" BECAUSE OF WORDS! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/197465.html

STRANGE SPORTS PIXS- LADY CYCLIST RACER - JUNK IN THE TRUNK! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197561.html

STRANGE DRIVING DANGERS - CHECKOUT THE WINDSHIELD AND FRIED DASHBOARD OF A CAR STRUCK BY LIGHTNING! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/197562.html

STRANGE WWII PICTURES - HOMESICK SOLDIERS PUT FAMILY PICTURES ON PISTOL GRIPS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197566.html

AMAZING CHRISTMAS TREES! - BEAUTIFUL! HOW FLOWERS CHANGE EVERYTHING! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197563.html

STRANGE STAR WARS RELATED PRODUCTS - SCARY DARTH VADER FIRE-PIT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197564.html

THE SCARY REALITY OF TODAY'S SOCIETY - WHERE PEOPLE GO IS IMPORTANT - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197552.html

1955 FORD LA TOSCA CONCEPT CAR - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/197450.html

MOTHER OF THE YEAR NOMINEE - MOM PUTS UP FENCE TO KEEP CRAWLING BABY ------- AWAY FROM HER!!!!!!!!!!!!! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197565.html

STRANGE MORONS & IDIOTS - CANADIAN LOTTO WINNER DIES AFTER GOLD PLATING HIS TESTICLES - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197554.html

STRANGE BODY BUILDER PICTURE - 32 YEARS LATER - 1981 VS 2012 - LESS HAIR ON HIS HEAD! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197555.html

1907 TEDDY ROOSEVELT IDEAS ON IMMIGRANTS AND BEING AMERICAN - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/197557.html

NASTY RAILROAD TRAIN ACCIDENTS - LUCKY SEMI DRIVES LOSES TRAILER AFTER TURNING ONTO CROSSING! - AMAZING ACTION GIF - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/197556.html

AMAZING OLDE CONCEPT CARS - DUESENBERG SIMONE - COUPE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197451.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SZ - Pets - ALL Dressed Up - Embarrassing Costumes and Outfits

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/100012_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Strange Death and Dying Stories and Facts - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/197379.html

- Cops: Salvation Army Volunteer Exposed Himself - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197560.html

- Angels Explained by Children - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/125118.html

- Strange New Word Contest - Mensa Invitational - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/175096.html

- Strange Inventors and Inventions - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/175332.html

- 25 Strange Uses For Coffee Filters - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/174085.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SZ - Pets - ALL Dressed Up - Embarrassing Costumes and Outfits

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/110_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

Please Click here to begin following: https://twitter.com/headstranger
https://www.facebook.com/pages/StrangeCosmoscom/278654660263

http://www.pinterest.com/headstranger/boards/

------------------------------------------------------------

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

==========================

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Samstag, 12. Dezember 2015

VOL 1486 - DEC. 13, 2015 - Clever Romantic Rhyme Contest

Dienstag, 8. Dezember 2015

VOL 1485 - DEC. 9, 2015 - Personality Test - What Cartoon Character are You?

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

---------------------------------------

DECEMBER FUN !

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

------------------------

==================================

Here are some comments made by sports commentators that I'm sure they would like to take back:

Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic Snatch and Jerk Event: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."

Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

Grand Prix Race Announcer: "The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical to the one in front of the similar one in back."

Greg Norman, Pro Golfer: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."

Ringside Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries and even some deaths in boxing - but none of them really that serious."

Baseball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."

Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Personality Test - What Cartoon Character are You?

Just another one of those personality tests....quick and easy....haha enjoy from Tweety.

Take a few minutes and have some fun!

Ever wondered which cartoon character you are most like? A team of researchers got together and analyzed the personalities of cartoon characters, and put the information gathered into this quiz. Answer each question with the answer that most describes you, then add up the points that correspond with your answer. Then send this to all your friends, including the person who sent it to you, with your cartoon character in the subject line. Keep track of the question numbers (1-10) and your answers.
You'll need both at the end.
1) What describes your perfect date?
a) Candlelight dinner for two b) Amusement park c) Roller blading in the park d) Rock concert e) See a movie

2) What is your favorite type of music?
a) Rock and Roll b) Alternative c) Soft Rock d) Classical e) Popular

3) What is your favorite type of movie?
a) Comedy b) Horror c) Musical d) Romance e) Documentary

4) Which of the following jobs would you chose if you were given only these choices?
a) Waiter/Waitress b) Sports Player c) Teacher d) Policeman e) Bartender

5) Which would you rather do if you had an hour to waste?
a) Work out b) Read c) Watch TV d) Listen to the radio e) Sleep

6) Of the following colors, which do you like the best?
a) yellow b) white c) sky blue d) teal e) red

7) Which one of the following would you like to eat right now?
a) ice cream b) pizza c) sushi d) pasta e) salad

8) What is your favorite holiday?
a) Halloween b) Christmas c) New Year's d) Valentine's Day e) Thanksgiving

9) If you could go to any of the following places, which would it be?
a) Paris b) Spain c) Las Vegas d) Hawaii e) Hollywood

10) Of the following, who would you rather spend time with?
a) Someone who is smart b) Someone with good looks c) Someone who is a party animal d) Someone who has fun all the time e) Someone who is very emotional

CHART to add up points Now total up your points and find your character below:

Q1 Q2 Q3 Q4 Q5
a 4pt a 2pt a 2pt a 4pt a 5pt
b 2pt b1pt b1pt b 5pt b 4pt
c 5pt c 4pt c 3pt c 3pt c 2pt
d 1pt d 5pt d 4pt d 2pt d 1pt
e 3pt e 3pt e 5pt e 1pt e 3pt

Q6 Q7 Q8 Q9 Q10
a 1pt a 3pt a 1pt a 4pt a 5pt
b 5pt b 2pt b 3pt b 5pt b 2pt
c 3pt c 1pt c 2pt c 1pt c 1pt
d 2pt d 4pt d 4pt d 2pt d 3pt
e 4pt e 5pt e 5pt e 3pt e 4pt

(10-17 points): You are TAZ! You are wild & crazy & you know it. You know how to have fun, but you may take it to extremes. You know what you are doing though, & are much in control of your own life. People don't always see things your way, but that doesn't mean that you should do away with your beliefs. Try to remember that your wild spirit can lead to hurting yourself & others.

(18-26 points) You are Bugs Bunny! You are fun, friendly, & popular. You are a real crowd pleaser. You have probably been out on the town your share of times, yet you come home with the values that your mother taught you. Marriage & children are important to you, but only after you have fun.
Don't let the people you please influence you to stray.

(27-34 points) You are Tweety! You are cute, & everyone loves you. You are a best friend that no one takes the chance of losing. You never hurt feelings & seldom have your own feelings hurt. Life is a breeze. You are witty, & calm most of the time. Just keep clear of back stabbers, & you are worry free.

(35-42 points) You are Pepe Le Pew! You are a lover.
Romance, flowers, & wine are all you need to enjoy yourself.
You are serious about all commitments. A family person. You call your Mom every Sunday, & never forget a Birthday. Don't let your passion for romance get confused with the real thing.

(43-50 points) You are Speedy Gonzales! You are smart, a real thinker. Every situation is approached with a plan. You are very healthy in mind & body. You teach strong family values.
Keep your feet planted in them, but don't overlook a bad situation when it does happen.

Now put your cartoon character in the subject line, then forward to your friends and back to the one who sent it to you.

No Rain NO Rainbow

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE NAVY FUN TIME ON DECK - TEMPORARY SWIMMING POOL SET UP FOR SOAKING ON THE HIGH SEAS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197203.html

STRANGE MILITARY FUN - PORTUGUESE DEFENSE MINISTER DEMOS THEIR LATEST DRONE - FAIL! FLIES STRAIGHT INTO THE SEA! - WILD ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/197199.html

STRANGE SECRET SOCIETIES - YALE UNIVERSITY - THE ORDER OF SKULL AND BONES - FOUNDED 1832 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197398.html

BEST SCHOOL EXCUSE NOTE EVER! - MILITARY DAD LETS TEACHERS KNOW ABOUT VETERANS DAY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197405.html

STRANGE BUSINESS PROBLEMS - SELECTING EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH - SOLVED - IT'S ME - THE MANAGER! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197429.html

STRANGE PARKING DANGERS - HANDICAPPED PARKING SIGN CLARIFIED FOR THE STUPID! - http://www.strangevacations.com/content/item/197430.html

COOL MILITARY PICTURES - WATERLINE VIEW FROM BOW OF SUBMARINE LOOKING UP AT MEN ON CONNING TOWER! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197431.html

STRANGE ALLIGATOR PROBLEMS - GREEN POND SCUM ON ITS MOUTH! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197432.html

NEWEST NAVY STEALTH SHIP - 600 FT USS ZUMWALT! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/197435.html

PREMATURE CELEBRATION - TRACK & FIELD STEEPLECHASE RUNNER FROM OREGON WAVES TO CROWD - LOSES RACE LAST MOMENT! - FUN ACTION GIF - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/197441.html

CHILD STARS WHO BECAME CRIMINALS - BRIAN BONSALL FROM DISNEY & FAMILY TIES - NICE NECK TATTOO AND LIP HARDWARE! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197442.html

STRANGE VEHICLE PAINT JOBS - AMAZING FLAMING ROPE MAN ON FAMILY VAN! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/197443.html

CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS ARE DIFFERENT OUT WEST - CACTUS SANTA HATS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197444.html

AMAZING MILITARY TANKS - POLISH OBRUM PL-01 CONCEPT TANK TO ENTER PRODUCTION IN 2018! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/197377.html

LIZARD MAKES SURE HIS FROGGY PAL SHUTS UP! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/197394.html

STRANGE JEWELRY - TINY CHESS SET IN THIS COOL RING! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197396.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - FRONT YARD DISPLAY DEPICTS BATMAN AND ROBIN CHASING THE JOKER WHO STOLE THE XMAS PRESENTS! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/197395.html

STRANGE CHRISTMAS TIME FUN - THE REAL COCA-COLA SANTA DELIVERS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197397.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SV - DAY TRIPS - STRANGE DESTINATIONS - BRIDGES - MOTELS - TOURIST SPOTS - GAS STATIONS - JUNK YARDS - DEALERSHIPS - PARKING LOTS

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/100726_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Who Will Solve These Mysteries About Barack Hussain Obama? - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/197400.html

Roasted! Burglar Stuck in Chimney Dies After Resident Lights Fire! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/197346.html

Seinfeld Quiz - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/21690.html

Rhetorical Wisdom - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/21956.html

Logic & Commonsense - 18 Quickies - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/21991.html

Ten Things You Didn't Know About Clint Eastwood - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/161972.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SV - DAY TRIPS - STRANGE DESTINATIONS - BRIDGES - MOTELS - TOURIST SPOTS - GAS STATIONS - JUNK YARDS - DEALERSHIPS - PARKING LOTS

http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/category/115_1.html

==================================

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT - Because of a number of requests, we are becoming more active of both Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook. We will periodically be Tweeting the latest BEST or Most UNIQUE pictures. WE WOULD LOVE TO HAVE YOU FOLLOWING US!

Please Click here to begin following: https://twitter.com/headstranger
https://www.facebook.com/pages/StrangeCosmoscom/278654660263

http://www.pinterest.com/headstranger/boards/

------------------------------------------------------------

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

==========================

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Samstag, 5. Dezember 2015

VOL 1484 - DEC. 6, 2015 - Strange Hospital Chart Notations

Freitag, 4. Dezember 2015

[b3ta] "These bombs are your fault, comedians. Your satire wasn't strong enough!"

"These bombs are your fault, comedians. Your satire wasn't strong enough!"

This Week:

* PROJECT - Introducing the 'Clickbait Robot'

* VIDEO - How Bladerunner would be shit with Siri

* B3TA_LINKS - Finally fixed on Twitter. YAY!

-------------------------------------------------

________ ____ __ ___

____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're saving

___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | the web

__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| ... together"

B3ta email 670 - 04 Dec 2015

Read this issue in your pants:

http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue670

Friend b3ta on Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/b3tan

-------------------------------------------------

: SPONSORED LINK

Amazing drum machine calculator thing

Oh, if you've got £48, this pocket calculator

style drum machine has kept us busy recently.

Huge sound, tiny price, perfect for Christmas.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00X6EYNQE/b3ta-21

-------------------------------------------------

Ok, we've been lazy and there's been no

newsletter for 22 weeks, tbh we can't promise

there's going to be one every week either but

today is you lucky day. LUCKY. There's a LOT to

get through so hold tight, we had to dig through

22 weeks of submissions for this. Christ on a

fucking bike, actually we binned most of it on

the basis that you don't want a newsletter about

four miles long. So here goes:

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DOING THESE WEEK

Other than making suspicious jam

>> Blade Runner With A Siri Interface <<

Black Moon writes, "The description kind of says

it all really. No point watching it now."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCDU8r7Tcfk

>> Loo Read - Walk on the Wired Side <<

Merkinhead writes, "My latest piece of

paronomasiac nonsense. Twitter profiles "sing"

Lou Reed. Hope this one stays up longer than

four days... (P.S. There's a tit in it - and I'm

not talking about Nick Kamen - so some might

consider it NSFW, although I've not ticked the

box.) "

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7-eezLEbcs

>> Top Ten Bad Word Wrongs <<

Eddache writes, "Learn how to talk more gooder"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_ebSnqnGXI

>> Dodge Zombies <<

I Smash Things in My Sleep Uruk-Hai writes,

"Just for Halloween, my little avoid the zombies

game. Seriously you will not last 3 minutes."

http://www.zettix.com/Graphics/js/dodge3d/index.html

>> Corporate Monopoly Game <<

Corington writes, "I made this for work - go

round the board trying not to lose all your

money to the evil capitalist hat (or just play

as the hat)"

http://www.globaljustice.org.uk/corporatemonopoly

-------------------------------------------------

: GIFT IDEAS FOR MEN

Seriously, we understand men and there's only

three things worth buying them. Cheese, booze or

socks. This isn't a joke, it's the truth.

Oh and this Whisky advent calendar looks very

nice. Buy that too.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B016C5MHQG/b3ta-21

-------------------------------------------------

: HELLO 'CLICKBAIT ROBOT'

Your B3ta editor has been coding

After not bothering for several years your B3ta

editor Rob has been learning Python and made a

bot that looks for trending items and turns them

into clickbait. Follow on Twitter, Facebook or Tumblr.

https://twitter.com/clickbaitrobot

https://www.facebook.com/clickbaitrobot

http://clickbaitrobot.tumblr.com/

* B3TA LINKS ON TWITTER - Rob also writes about

his other bot, "The B3tan, WeirdWeb made this a

few years back and it stopped working (2 years

ago?) - so he gave me the account and I wrote

some exciting code that does pretty much the

same thing as it always did."

https://twitter.com/b3ta_links

-------------------------------------------------

: HOW TO GET YOUR STUFF IN THIS NEWSLETTER

Simple really, post on /links/

All you have to do is post your thingie-bob

on our links board and if the community and

or the site editors like it then you'll appear

here. Go on, join in, but don't post and run,

hang around and chat a bit else the regulars

get arsey.

http://b3ta.com/links/

-------------------------------------------------

: SITES IN BRIEF

Flat, slow, clicky

* 16 ROMANIAN PHRASES THAT BRITISH PEOPLE FIND

HILARIOUS - B3tans Rob Manuel & HappyToast did

this listicle for Azimo who aren't paying us to

promo it but we might as well, anyway it's good!

Really!

https://azimo.com/en/blog/16-romanian-phrases-british-people-find-hilarious

* DON'T GIVE THE SUBS ACID - Fred Zeppelin

writes, "Very Funny 'Story' From the

Peterborough Standard, 1979. Goes off on

something of a tangent, let's say."

http://bravenewmalden.com/2011/02/03/the-fremony-at-the-library/

* SNAKE - THE TEXT ADVENTURE - Bootsthealchemist

writes, "The Most Fully Awesome Online Version

of Snake You've Ever Played!"

http://www.draknek.org/games/shitsnake2/#7.l.e.17.q.1e.g.f

* WHAT'S YOUR 'SPINAL TAP GUITARIST' NAME - A

little known fact is that the name Nigel Tufnell

is a play on Eric Clapton. I.e. boring bloke

name plus London location. Tube and train

stations work well.

http://www.thepoke.co.uk/2015/12/03/whats-spinal-tap-guitarist-name/

-------------------------------------------------

: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE:

Some 'free' ideas

* Get The Pet Shop Boys to do a cover of Lorem

Ipsum. "Lorem. Lorem. Lorem ipsum dolor sit

amet."

* Start a Kickstarter for a 'drugs advent

calendar' Bit of smack, lsd & whatevs behind each

door. Finish with a cocaine 'white Christmas'

* Find a terrorist and ask them what they want.

Read lots of "that's what the terrorists want!"

but few seem to ask them directly.

-------------------------------------------------

: VIDEO SCHMIDEO

Like TV but even shittier

* THIS VIDEO IS PURE WOW - here's a pure

emotional truth in this song, "the world is

burning, let's masturbate". Not even joking.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iIGGiejBKY

* FOAM AD - TheWooinator writes, 'I Genuinely

Stumbled across this co looking for some foam

for my sofa, saw they had a promo and thought,

"I bet this HAS to be the most dull promo in

history"'

http://www.thefoamshop.co.uk/page/152/promo-video

* NORTHERN STAR WARS DIRECTED BY KEN LOACH -

Pissflaps. writes, "Yoda: 'Shit out of you they

will kick'"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSSFNhF4HSk

-------------------------------------------------

: QUESTION OF THE WEEK

Revenge II

Here's the best stories from last week:

* OUTSIDE THE DRIFTWOOD SPARS, ST AGNES - I

found Mrs Andrew Ridgeley's purse in the car

park of the Driftwood Spars pub. It was

stacked with cash and cards. I took it into

the pub and handed it to the barman. He then

took it over to Mr & Mrs Ridgeley who were

eating at a table in the corner of the bar.

The barman handed her the purse, and pointed

at me to indicate who had handed it in. They

didn't even wave at me. No free drink. No pat

on the back from the former Wham 'guitarist /

singer' or from his equally talented 'singer

from Bananarama' wife. I've not bought a

single Wham or Bananarama record since that

day. That'll teach them. Thinking about it I

have bought compilation albums with both

'bands' songs on them. Shit, shit, shit.

Really pissed off now.

(insignificantsnivellinglittleturd)

* IN A CERTAIN NORTH LONDON FIRE

STATION............ - There is (or at least

was) a 20 year old framed picture on the wall

of then local MP and Prime Minister Margaret

Thatcher. She is surrounded by the boys of Red

Watch and smiling whilst holding a large mug

of tea. Each of the firemen in that photo had

specially wiped their dirty, stinking cocks

around the inside of that mug before her

"photo opportunity" visit. Sweet revenge for

the wave of Fire Station closures that she had

instigated. I feel sure that she is not aware

of this to this day. (Zuowan)

* Read all the other answers from the 'Revenge

II' question:

http://b3ta.com/questions/Revenge2

>> This week: While the cat's away <<

This weeks question from social hand grenade who

asks, "What have you done when your other half

has gone off somewhere for the weekend?"

http://b3ta.com/questions/catsaway

-------------------------------------------------

: IMAGE CHALLENGE

Breakdance

Here's the best images from last week:

* ELECTRIC WHEELCHAIR BOOGALOO - (Ninj)

http://b3ta.com/board/11178979

* SKEGNESS IS SO BREAKDANCING - (Ya What?)

http://b3ta.com/board/11178982

* CLASSIC BREAKDANCE MOVE 'THE WINDMILL' RENAMED

'THE WINDMIDDLETON' BY ROYAL DECREE -

(R2Dtard)

http://b3ta.com/board/11179417

* See all the other images from the 'Breakdance'

challenge:

http://b3ta.com/challenge/breakdance

>> This week: Comedy Music Mash up <<

It's a simple mash up crossover challenge this

week. Put musicians in to comedies and comedy

characters in to bands. Plenty of punnage to be

had.

http://b3ta.com/challenge/comedymusicmash

-------------------------------------------------

Follow b3ta on Twitter:

https://www.twitter.com/b3ta

-------------------------------------------------

TOP TIP: IF YOU'RE IN AUSTRALIA AND YOU SWALLOW

A FLY - Don't swallow a spider to catch it, most

are poisonous and you'll die before you even get

to the horse. (oneinthepink)

Add your own 'top tip' at:

http://b3ta.com/questions/toptips

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Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Dienstag, 29. Dezember 2015

VOL 1491 - DEC. 30, 2015 - New Year's Resolutions for Pets

Samstag, 26. Dezember 2015

VOL 1490 - DEC. 27, 2015 - 10 Hilarious Cover Letter Blunders

Dienstag, 22. Dezember 2015

VOL 1489 - DEC. 23, 2015 - Strange Christmas Facts

Samstag, 19. Dezember 2015

VOL 1488 - DEC. 20, 2015 - A Politically Correct Christmas Poem

Dienstag, 15. Dezember 2015

VOL 1487 - DEC. 16, 2015 - Christmas Quiz - Can you Name These Carols?

Samstag, 12. Dezember 2015

VOL 1486 - DEC. 13, 2015 - Clever Romantic Rhyme Contest

Dienstag, 8. Dezember 2015

VOL 1485 - DEC. 9, 2015 - Personality Test - What Cartoon Character are You?

Samstag, 5. Dezember 2015

VOL 1484 - DEC. 6, 2015 - Strange Hospital Chart Notations

Freitag, 4. Dezember 2015

[b3ta] "These bombs are your fault, comedians. Your satire wasn't strong enough!"

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