Vol 716 - July 30, 2008 - Strange Fascinating Facts

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

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NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

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Strange Marriage Quotes by Men:

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out...'

Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Strange Fascinating Facts

Fascinating Facts: Trivial Pursuit

Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?
A. Conception.

Q. Only 14% of Americans say they've done this with the opposite sex.
What is it?
A. Skinny dipping.

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace. This is propinquity.

Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession

Q. More women do this in the bathroom than men.
A. Wash their hands. Women: 80%, men: 55%.

Q. What do 100% of all lottery winners do?
A. Gain weight.

Q. In a recent survey, Americans revealed that this was their favorite smell.
A. Banana.

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand.

Q. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windscreen wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.

Q. Married men revealed that they do this twice as often as single men.
A. Change their underwear.

Q. This stimulates 29 muscles and chemicals causing relaxation. Women seem to like it light and frequent, men like it more strenuous.
A. A kiss.

Q. This is the only food that doesn't spoil.
A. Honey.

Q. 40% of all people who come to a party in your home do this?
A. Have a look in your medicine cabinet.

Q. 3.9% of all women surveyed say they never do this.
A. Wear underwear.

Q. What common everyday occurrence is composed of 59% nitrogen, 21% hydrogen, and 9% carbon dioxide?
A. A fart.

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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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DANGEROUS AIRPORTS - 1 - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140254.html

TIGER CUB WITH HIS DOGGY PAL - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140715.html

AMAZING NATURAL ROCK BRIDGE - POTOSI, BOLIVIA - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140724.html

STRANGE SKYDIVING - ACCORDION PLAYER! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140834.html

STRANGE CLOUD FORMATIONS - SPIRALS OVER CASTLE - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140862.html

11954 DODGE GHIA 'FIRE ARROW 'ROADSTER - CONCEPT CAR - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140879.html

STRANGE FIRE STATIONS - COLOGNE, GERMANY - 1 - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140940.html

COOL "WOVEN" BACON - GREAT FOR SANDWICHES! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140944.html

COOL CHROME PORSCHE 911 - AWESOME! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140974.html

MAKE SURE YOUR CRUISE SHIP KEEPS AN EYE OUT FOR ICEBERGS! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140975.html

STRANGE WOODEN CAR - FRONT - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140981.html

STRANGE KAMIKAZE PIGEON - WITH AWARDS FOR PAST VICTORIES! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140983.html

STRANGE HORSE RACE - PAINTED LIKE A ZEBRA! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140985.html

BIG DOG RIDES ON MASTERS BACK - ON A MOTOR SCOOTER! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140986.html

SCARY 3-D DINOSAUR ! - GIF - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140992.html

STRANGE PROFILE TREE - NATIONAL LEADERS OF INDIA - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140993.html

USN AIRSHIP USS MACON ZRS-5 OVER NEW YORK CITY - 1933 - BLIMP - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/141011.html

STRANGE HORSE TRAINING VEHICLE - 8 - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/141034.html

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The Featured Pix Category This Week - Strange Business Buildings - Companies - Vehicles - Designs

http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/category/100435_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Strange "Ugly Club" Takes on the Beautiful People - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/141024.html

Strange Facts You Should Know About Men - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/141025.html

Definition of Words by Gender - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/141027.html

You Might be a Leprechaun if....... - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/25502.html

Chinese Translations - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/104207.html

Chinese Proverbs - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/102838.html

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The Featured New Category This Week - Cities - States & Regions of the USA

http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/category/136_1.html

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Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

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********** This message printed on recyclable media*********** (Think about it!)

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

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HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055

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Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

Vol 715 - July 27, 2008 - Creative Comeback Lines for the Office

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange Quotes: Famous Curses!

May your every wish be granted. - Ancient Chinese Curse

May your left ear wither and fall into your right pocket. - Arab Curse

May those that love us, love us;
and to those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts;
and if He doesn't turn their hearts,
may He turn their ankles
so we'll know them by their limping.
- - - Old Irish Toast

May you wander over the face of the earth forever, never sleep twice in the same bed, never drink water twice from the same well, and never cross the same river twice in a year. - Traditional Gypsy Curse

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Creative Comeback Lines for the Office

1. Obviously you're unable to assimilate my stimulating concepts into your blighted and simplistic world-view.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

4. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of it.

5. I like you. You remind me of me when I was young and stupid.

6. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?!?

7. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

8. I'll give you a nice, shiny quarter if you'll go away.

9. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

11. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

13. How about never? Is never good for you?

14. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

15. You sound reasonable. It must be time to up my medication.

16. You're just jealous because the little voices talk to ME.

17. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

20. Who me? I just wander from room to room.

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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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STRANGE WWI SOLDIER FORMATIONS - 21,000 MEN CAMP SHERMAN, CHILLICOTHE, OHIO 1918 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/139599.html

STRANGE BOAT NAMES - 1 - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140197.html

GERMANY GRAF ZEPPLIN - EXPLODES IN NEW JERSEY! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140732.html

STRANGE BATTLESTAR GALACTICA "LAST SUPPER?" - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140772.html

THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER - THE ORIGINAL! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140801.html

WWII - ACTION PHOTOS - FIGHTER BOMBER GOES DOWN - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140808.html

SOAPBOX DERBY RACER - FLYING DOWN THE TRACK! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140823.html

STRANGE POLICE CHASE - A STOLEN ARMY TANK ! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140824.html

STRANGE 4TH BIRTHDAY CAKE FOR LIL' DERRICK - GRAND THEFT AUTO! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140831.html

WHAT DO YOU MEAN "FARMERS TAN?" - TOUR BE FRANCER GETS READY FOR BICYCLE RACE - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140832.html

STRANGE CLOUD FORMATIONS - COVERS MOUNTAIN TOP! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140856.html

STRANGE "UGLY" LITTLE FISH! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140866.html

STRANGE PLACE TO RIDE A UNICYCLE - ROCK LEDGE! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140877.html

1953 BUICK WILDCAT - CONCEPT CAR - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140878.html

STRANGE SPORTS - BUBBLE BALL WATER WALKING! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140906.html

STRANGE ROCK FORMATION - IT LOOKS SAD! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140914.html

B-2 BOMBER - AERIAL REFUELING TANKER - COOL SUNSET - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140918.html

STRANGE FIRE STATIONS - HOUTEN, NETHERLANDS - 2 - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140936.html

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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SM - MILITARY EQUIPMENT - STEALTH - AIRPLANES - SHIPS - SECRET EQUIPMENT - BLACK OPS

http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/category/100686_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

100 of the World's Funniest One Liners - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/140750.html

The Idiots at Penn. Dept of Environmental Quality & The Dam Beavers - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/115617.html

Strange Actual Medical Notes - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/114510.html

Another "Fictional" Lawyer Story? - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/111426.html

Warnings That You Really Should Heed - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/24550.html

Witness Embarrasses Both Attorneys ! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/24207.html

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The Featured New Category This Week - Jokes ? ALL Kinds, Puns, Quotes, Slams

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/102_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

********** This message printed on recyclable media*********** (Think about it!)

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055

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Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

[b3ta] "...CHIPS IT IS THEN, say Portuguese Police"

This Week:
* FOOD - The Jaffegg
* PICS - Souvenir vs. Reality
* SCIENCE - Chemistry vids!

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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "Upset by somebody !
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | on the internet?
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| DISCONNECT!"

B3ta email 338 - 25 JULY 2008 - Winchester Ed.

Read this issue with Bowser. Or Wario.
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue338/

Win: b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Fail: b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

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: SPONSORED LINK
Amazing yawning lions

Check out this online ad for a Samsung digital
camera. It's loaded with all the worst sort of
tired advertising cliches like yawning lions,
rapping dead gazelles and bopping meercats.
Why on earth can't these marketing idiots
ever try something new?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=peskb1KOEa0

>> Sponsor B3ta <<
Want this space? Then talk to us.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/

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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
Eggs, Money and Wanks (Our life really)

>> The Jaffegg <<
A scotch egg without all the tedious white -
just a smashing orangey bit of yolk. Sickpuppy
spent an evening turning the b3ta board's dream
into a sausagey, eggy reality. They look
extremely scary.
http://snipurl.com/eggylols [www_fatuous_co_uk]

>> Coin stack challenge <<
Your bored newsletter editors spent a sunny
afternoon stacking coins in the back-garden to
see who could make a higher pile. It's tough at
the top.
http://www.b3ta.com/features/coinstackchallenge/

>> Masturbation euphemisms <<
"I've had a theory for a while that any
combination of verb and noun can be a metaphor
for masturbation," burps flatfrog. "I created
the Marvellous Masturbation Metaphor Generator
to test the theory. Conclusion: it kind of
works. Now I'm off to strap the cloth."
http://b3ta.com/links/The_marvellous_masturbation_metaphor_generator

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: QUESTION OF THE WEEK
Tales of the Silver Screen

Each week you tell us lies, and we stick them
online before FHM.com does.

Last week we asked you for your favourite films
and how a trip to the cinema changed your life.
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/films/

* SUPERHEROES! - "When I was four, my mum took
me to the cinema to see Superman, where I sat
wiggling with excitement in my seat, unable to
contain myself. This continued right up until
Lex Luthor has Superman, weakened by
kryptonite, drowning in his swimming pool. At
which point I ran, tears streaming down my
cheeks, screaming to the front of the cinema
and yelled at the screen: 'Come on Superman,
you can do it!' to gales of laughter from the
rest of the audience. To which I responded by
having a tantrum and repeating in my snotty
high-pitched sob 'Stop laughing, stop laughing,
stop laughing!' I'm now 34 and my Mum still
tells that story to anyone she meets for the
first time. Cow." (scarpe)

* ZOMBIES! - I used to go to the flicks every
Tuesday, usually to watch terrible horror
movies. This was in the days when you'd get two
movies for your money with an intermission
between the features. So there we were, first
flick finished, the lights came up and one of
the usherettes appeared in front of the screen
to sell ice-cream. One strapping Geordie lad
bought a couple of ices and walked back to his
seat, one in each hand. Then, suddenly, from
one of the curtains covering the fire exits, a
shambling monstrosity appeared. Off-green skin
tone, ripped clothing, lots of visible
festering wounds, head to one side - the whole
zombie experience. The strapping Geordie lad,
Cornettos clutched proudly in each hand, did
what any other full-blooded Geordie would do.
He screamed like a girl and kicked the zombie
right in the knackers. It turned out that the
zombie - which hit the floor like a sack of
shit - was a member of the theatre staff who
was dressed up to promote the next week's
horror offering. (Legless)

* DINOSAURS! - The touching tale of Spielberg's
epic dino movie, a doomed stunt goat and blind
panic in the auditorium. A modern classic, and
well worth your click. (Dr Tugnut2)
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/films/post203246

>> This week: Pointless Experiments <<
Come on, we've all tried to live for a week and
an all-sweetcorn and beetroot diet to see if
we'd get yellow poo and purple wee, haven't we?
Tell us how you've diced with death in the name
of science.
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/experiments/

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: SITES IN BRIEF
Like if Reddit only ran 6 links per week

>> Xxx Xxx <<
Ask willy about sex
Hilarious!
(Ich Kommen
http://www.bebooksonline.co.uk/girls_and_boys/default.htm

>> Souvenir vs. reality pics <<
Simply an excellent idea - take photos holding
up postcards and tacky keepsakes, masking views
of national landmarks. Some of the buses are
particularly amusing.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/michael_hughes/sets/346406/show

>> Creepy Prague TV tower <<
Frighteningly reminiscent of The Tripods, this
futuristic structure looms over the Czech
skyline. But wait... what are those figures
crawling all over it? They seem to be... giant
naked babies? And a closer look? Aiee!
http://deputy-dog.com/2008/07/17/ever-seen-a-creepier-tower/

>> Rate my network diagram <<
First it was Hot or Not, then it was Rate My
Kitten... Now it seems the nerds have caught up
with the internet. Check out these highly
stimulating pics of interlinked servers.
http://www.ratemynetworkdiagram.com/

>> "You are beautiful" <<
A bunch of arty types stick styrofoam cups into
a chain link fence to spell out a positive
message, then sit back to watch. It's not long
before negative-minded passers-by muscle in on
the action, modifying the message to their own
tastes...
http://www.you-are-beautiful.com/INSTALLATIONS/cupfence1.html

>> Angry journo whine <<
Times scribe Giles Coren lays into the
newspaper's hapless sub-editors after they
changed a single letter of his submitted piece.
We are, to be honest, quite sympathetic - we'd
*hate* for anyone to meddle with our deathless
prose. But surely he could see he was laying
himself open to the ensuing 127 comments
calling him a cunt.
http://www.order-order.com/2008/07/sub-standard.html

>> Crank calls <<
One of the blokes behind tip-top TV lolfest
Look Around You has a new book out - and to
promote it he's been making a series of prank
phone calls. Here he is, relentlessly wasting
the time of some poor call-centre monkey at
118118.
http://www.videojug.com/film/prank-call-118-118

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: THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO AAHH
Baby sloth

This sleepy little sloth is barely a handful of
hugs and fuzz. Oh, and it's part of a photo set
titled Tiny Animals, which looks to be a rich
vein of cuteness.
http://snipurl.com/theslothofkahn [www_flickr_com]

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: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Video is the new animated gif

>> Periodic table of vids <<
The periodic table of elements and a video of
experiments for each, in what seems almost a
pitch for a Top Gear of science. Check out the
professor's awesome hair!
http://www.periodicvideos.com/

>> Font conference <<
The organisation of typefaces gathers to
consider admitting Zapf Dingbats to its ranks,
but danger rears its head. Nice selection of
gags for the graphic design-inclined.
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1823766

>> Oobleck <<
Like watching the dawn of life in a tray of
milk. Oobleck is, apparently, a non-Newtonian
substance made from cornstarch and water. It
goes from liquid to solid when under stress. It
certainly looks cool when put on top of a
speaker.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp1wUodQgqQ

>> Crazy Saudi skate stunt <<
Fucking hell. Blokes in traditional Saudi
dress, on the motorway, rollerblading while
hanging onto a car. They aren't even proper
rollerblades - they look like a sandal version
of those rolly shoes small children wear.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJupNDIKkEk

>> Doctor Horrible <<
Joss Whedon's serial musical about an inept
supervillain is excellent, ticking a load of
lol boxes at B3ta Towers. Shame you can't
watch it on the official site. Still, enjoy
YouTube and, hey, buy the DVD when it comes
out, kids! (Or download it from piratebay)
http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?docid=-3005053008436922571

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: FUNNY NAME CORNER
One dick, one cock, it's the B3ta newsletter

* 'STREWTH MATE! G-Funk babbles, "I was
watching Crocodile Dundee 2 the other night.
There wasn't much else on and, to be honest,
it's not bad. However, just as I stood up to
turn off the TV, I noticed a rather strange
name in the credits."
http://www.coolsmartphone.com/images/stories/crocdundee2-big.jpg

* COCK CACTUS - from the 'things that look like
other stuff' files comes this set of succulents
that resemble schlongs. Also reminiscent of
Vagina dentata. Which is nice.
http://www.sarahillenberger.com/news_viagra.html

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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Low budget film remakes: results!

Your favourites included:

* SEARCH FOR SPOCK - can't find him on Google,
maybe they should have Asked Jeeves? (calibrax)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8565614

* GHOST - naughty Blinky! Demi's tits are not
for spunking ectoplasm on. (Brian O'Blivion )
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8566308

* MSDOS 2001 - Poor Hal, someone should have
checked config.sys for conflicting drivers.
(maximinimus)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8579739

All these images, and the highest as voted by
you can be found here, or you could look at
the lowest voted if you're some kind of
masochist.
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/lowbudgetfilmremakes/

>> Abusive Ducks - New challenge <<
Ducks are complete shits, famous for
wife-beating and general duck abuse. Show the
world you're on to them. Blame the board for
this when - they had mini-revolt and insisted
on ducks, in some form of dirty protest.
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/abusiveducks/

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: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Follow-ups on previous stories.

ANT TRAILS - "Just read last week's newsletter
Top Tip about confusing ants by crossing their
path with chalk," explains Kaol. "They walk in
lines because they follow scent trails that
other ants have laid down. A bit like tramps
following the reek of Special Brew to find the
Cardboard City. Rubbing chalk across the line
will rub the scent trail away, so they'll get
lost and confused. To be fair, rubbing anything
across the line would do the job. Cheese, a
severed toe or even a damp sponge would work
well."

BABY TIGER - The animal in the 'T' section of
last week's featured Baby Animal Alphabet
"bears a remarkably close resemblance to Robin
Williams," observes Alcoholics Heironymous. By
crikey - so it does! Poor, furry creature...
http://dalesdesigns.net/animals/baby_tiger.jpg

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: FRIDAY GAME
Heath Robinson game

Our favourite-ever PC game was The Incredible
Machine, so quite why we didn't linky this last
week is anyone's guess, as it was all over the
interwebs and some of you wrote in to complain
about its absence. Haven't you got anything
better to do? Like eat cake?
http://fantasticcontraption.com/

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: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

Make something cool and tell us about it. If
you are in it then people will see your stuff.

Things we'd really like to see include

* NAZI LOLS - The Vomiting Hitchhiker shouts,
"I am thinking of starting 'International Talk
Like A Nazi Day', in the spirit of Dr
Strangelove, Springtime for Hitler, 'Allo 'Allo
etc, but I'm worried that it might still be a
bit soon. What do your readers think?"

* ELECTRIC TEA EXPERIMENT - cowjam writes, "I
want to know which is cheaper, making tea using
an electric kettle or one on the gas hob. Tea
is important, and so is money. And I can't be
arsed to work it out for myself."

* LOWEST MB SD CARD CHALLENGE - we've got one
that's 16MB can you beat that?

Send contributions via the mail form.
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THANKS:

This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
Stevenson. Stuff sent in by thewingedcroc, The
Fretful Porpentine, Rusty, SockCooker
Additional linkage and image challenge by
Fraser Lewry. Alistair Coleman is QOTW bloke.
Subjectline via The Great Architect.

-------------------------------------------------

TOP TIP:
Prevent your grubby work colleagues from
nicking your milk by decanting it into a soya
milk carton or bottle. No-one will touch it,
believe me. (Bad Horsey)

-------------------------------------------------

SICKIPEDIA:
What was Michelle McManus' favourite musical
instrument at school? The dinner bell.
http://www.sickipedia.org/

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Vol 714 - July 23, 2008 - Letters of Recommendation Phrases

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

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Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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==================================

Strange "My Philosophy on Success" Quotes

I don't meet competition. I crush it. - Charles Revson

I'm not the type to get ulcers. I give them. - Ed Koch

I don't want people to know what I'm actually like. It's not good for an actor - Jack Nicholson, 1993

I always figured the American public wanted a solemn ass for president, so I went along with them. -Calvin Coolidge

I don't read books, I write them. - Henry Kissinger

If people screw me, I screw back in spades. - Donald Trump

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Strange Letters of Recommendation Phrases

Letters Of Recommendation Phrases

Have to write a letter of recommendation for that fired employee? - Here are a few suggested phrases:

For the chronically absent:
"A man like him is hard to find."
"It seemed her career was just taking off."

For the office drunk:
"I feel his real talent is wasted here."
"We generally found him loaded with work to do."
"Every hour with him was a happy hour."

For an employee with no ambition:
"He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put in."
"You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for you."

For an employee who is so unproductive that the job is better left unfilled:
"I can assure you that no person would be better for the job."

For an employee who is not worth further consideration as a job candidate:
"I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an offer of employment."
"All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this candidate or recommend him too highly."

For a stupid employee:
"There is nothing you can teach a man like him."
"I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no qualifications whatsoever."

For a dishonest employee:
"Her true ability was deceiving."
"He's an unbelievable worker."

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE VEHICLES THAT RUN ON RAILROAD TRACKS - OLD MODEL-T WITH TRAILER - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/139774.html

STRANGE NASA "MOON LANDING HOAX" PICTURES - PROOF? - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140023.html

STRANGE SNAKE CAR - SNAKE PAINT - REAL SNAKE DRIVING! - 1 - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140071.html

STRANGE NAVY STEALTH CRAFT - SEA TRIALS - BOW VIEW - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140709.html

LITTLE GREEN LIZARD - KICKIN BACK! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140711.html

STRANGE BAT ABOUT TO BITE LITTLE FROG - NIGHT SHOT! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140714.html

STRANGE OLD PIX - 3 ZOO OFFICIALS WRESTLE WITH HUGE BOA CONSTRICTOR - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140716.html

STRANGE DOG GROOMING CONTEST - HE LOOKS LIKE A CAMEL! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140717.html

STRANGE SUV - "SUSHI" SPARE TIRE COVER - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140720.html

STRANGE LOUNGE LIZARD BICYCLE - WITH STEERING WHEEL! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140722.html

STRANGE ROCK FORMATION - BOLIVIA - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140723.html

COPS GIVE BRICK THROWER STRANGE KFC REWARD! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140728.html

STRANGE FOREIGN WEAPONS - CHUCK NORRIS "NUN" CHUCKS! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/140729.html

AH-64 APACHE ATTACK HELICOPTER - WITH SOLDIER RIDING SHOTGUN! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140768.html

STRANGE OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - 3-D BOXES - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140769.html

DRIVER OF THIS FLIPPED SEMI TRUCK HAS GREAT VIEW FROM WINDSHIELD! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140770.html

AMAZING SEAWORLD DOLPHIN STUNT - SHE RIDES ON THEIR NOSES AND HE JUMPS OVER! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140771.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SZ - LIONS - TIGERS - Jaguars - Cougars - Leopards

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/100643_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

TOP 20 Quotes of Mark Twain aka Sam Clemens - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140169.html

Rules for Teachers - 1915 - Sacramento Schoolhouse - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140507.html

Strange 7 Question Test - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140751.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - Professionals - MD's, Lawyers, Police, etc.
http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/112_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

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#1 Stranger

---------------------

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Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

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------------------------

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Vol 710 - July 09, 2008 - Things That Are Difficult to say When Drunk * RESEND *

OUR E-MAIL SERVERS WERE NOT WORKING THAT WEEK AND MOST MEMBERS DID NOT RECEIVE THIS ISSUE, SO HERE YOU GO! - THANKS!

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange "I'm Not Very Bright" Quotes

I don't necessarily agree with everything I say. - Marshall McLuhan

I never know how much of what I say is true. - Bette Midler

I have nothing intelligent to say. - Meg Tilly, when approached by a TV reporter asking questions on her way into the 1997 Oscar ceremonies.

I am not denying anything I did not say. -Brian Mulrooney

I really didn't say everything I said. - Yogi Berra

I'm a meathead. I can't help it, man. You've got smart people and you've got dumb people. - Keanu Reeves

My movies were the kind they show in prisons and airplanes, because nobody can leave. -Burt Reynolds

I'm no actor, and I have sixty-four pictures to prove it. - Victor Mature

Of all the things I've ever lost I miss my mind the most. - Steven Tyler

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - -Things That Are Difficult to say When Drunk

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Indubitably

Innovative

Preliminary

Proliferation

Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Specificity

British Constitution

Passive-aggressive disorder

Loquacious

Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

"Thanks, but I don't want to have sex"

"Nope, no more booze for me"

"Sorry, but you're not really my type"

"Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?"

"Oh I couldn't, nobody wants to hear me sing...."

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE "GHOST" PICTURES - 2 - LITTLE GIRL ON THE STAIRS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/139579.html

STRANGE WWI SOLDIER FORMATIONS - 19,000 MEN - CAMP LEE - VA - 1918 - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/139596.html

HORSE RESCUED FROM FREEZING POND - MANY FIREMAN! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/139744.html

STRANGE VEHICLES THAT RUN ON RAILROAD TRACKS - 50'S CHEVY STATION WAGON - STREAMLINED! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/139768.html

RACHEL RAY - FOOD CHANNEL HOTTIE - WARDROBE MALFUNCTION! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/140175.html

STRANGE WEDDING CAKE - IT'S THE BRIDE! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140180.html

STRANGE HUGE SNOW FENCE! - BE CAREFUL! TIME TO MOVE SOUTH? - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140181.html

STRANGE DUCKLING DIVE - WHO'S NEXT? - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140184.html

STRANGE CRASHED UFO PIXS - RUSSIA - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140183.html

STRANGE ONE WHEEL "PANDA" MOTORCYCLE - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140185.html

STRANGE OLDE PANORAMA OF MOSCOW RUSSIA SKYLINE - 1901! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140186.html

GREAT INNOVATIVE GI'S WWII HOSPITAL - ROOMMATE HELPS PAL SMOKE A CIGARETTE! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140187.html

STRANGE DUCKLINGS HITCHING A RIDE ON TOY SAILBOAT! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140188.html

STRANGE CAR DESIGN - LOOKS LIKE AN UGLY FISH! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140189.html

STRANGE KARATE DEMONSTRATION - BREAKING BRICKS - HEALING - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140190.html

STRANGE OLDE STAGECOACH PICTURE - COWBOYS & INDIANS! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140191.html

STRANGE FOOSBALL TABLE - IT'S HUGE - 20 + PLAYERS NEEDED - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140192.html

STRANGE SHOPPING BAG - HER PIGTAILS ARE THE HANDLES! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140193.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SP - COPS AT WORK - Action - Arrests - Issuing Tickets - Resting ?

http://www.strangepolice.com/content/category/100378_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Strange Job Application Blunders - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/139081.html

TOP 15 Strangest Coincidences - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140170.html

Things That Change After College - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140171.html

What "Gender" is a Computer? - Students Answer - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/140174.html

Strange English For Tourists - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/103452.html

Man Marries For 53rd Time ! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/102945.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SP - COPS AT WORK - Action - Arrests - Issuing Tickets - Resting ?

http://www.strangepolice.com/content/category/112_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

********** This message printed on recyclable media*********** (Think about it!)

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055

------------------------

Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

Vol 713 - July 20, 2008 - Strange 'Actual" Book Titles

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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==================================

Strange Celeb Quotes:

If I walked on water people would say I couldn't swim. - John Turner

The truth is, I've made about 30 movies in 30 years, and I've been criticized for 30 years for not making more movies. - Dustin Hoffman

Celebrity is a pretty stunning thing. At first I was like 'They love me! Oh, I love them, too.' And suddenly, I was tap-dancing on my pedestal and it was whack! Facedown in the dirt. - Sharon Stone, Oct. 14, 1994

Just because you like my stuff doesn't mean I owe you anything. - Bob Dylan

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood--Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy. - Goldie Hawn

Just standing around looking beautiful is so boring, really boring, so boring. - Michelle Pfeiffer

Sure the body count in this movie bothers me, but what are you gonna do? It's what everybody likes. At least it's not an awful body count - it's a fun body count. - Bonnie Bedelia

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Bizarre Books (Real)

1. Mated With A Clown; 1884

2. Our Lady of the Potatoes; 1995

3. The Joy of the Upright Man; 1619

4. My Invisible Friend Explains the Bible; 1971

5. Follow Your Broken Nose; 1950

6. The Great Pantyhose Crafts Book; 1982

7. Pernicious Pork; or, Astounding Revelations of the Evil
Effects of Eating Swine Flesh; 1903

8. Thirty-six Reasons for Believing in Everlasting Punishment;
1887

9. 1587. A Year of No Importance; n.p.

10. Life and Laughter 'midst the Cannibals; 1926

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE WWI SOLDIER FORMATIONS - 22,500 MACHINE GUNNERS - CAMP HANCOCK - AUGUSTA, GA - 1918 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/139597.html

TWO CAMELS IN THE BACK OF A PICKUP PEUGEOT TRUCK! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/139908.html

DANGEROUS AIRPORTS - 2 - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140253.html

STRANGE PARROT RIDING A UNICYCLE ON A STRING! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140388.html

STRANGE "PACMAN" CLOUD - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140532.html

OLD RONALD REAGAN CIGARETTE AD - 2 - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/140533.html

STRANGE KITES SAILING ON THE BEACH - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140535.html

HUGE WAVE BREAKS OVER LIGHTHOUSE! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140542.html

STRANGE "SKELETON" MOTORCYCLE - 1 - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140553.html

STRANGE STEER WITH HUGE HORNS! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140575.html

NEW GAS PUMP SIGN - TOO HIGH? JUST END IT! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140650.html

STRANGE LITTLE THREE WHEEL CAR - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140651.html

SILVER PLATED ORNATE MACHINE GUN! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140676.html

MODERN MILITARY SOLDIERS IN AFRICA FULLY EQUIPPED - AK-47 & IPOD ! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140677.html

WWII - CARRIER LANDING PROBLEM - FIGHTER PLANE ON FIRE - OFF DECK - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140681.html

NAVY HOSPITAL SHIP MERCY T-AH 19 - AMAZING RAINBOW - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140704.html

INADEQUACY - GET USED TO YOUR WEINER? OSCAR M - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140725.html

STRANGE POPE "DEVIL" PICTURE? MAN BEHIND SHIRT COLLAR! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140727.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SZ - BABY ANIMALS! Cute - Cuddly - Tiny - Helpless - Amazing!

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/100663_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

The 10 Strangest Will Bequests Ever - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/140195.html

Strangest Suicide in History? - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140504.html

Strange Letter to the IRS - YOU Take these 3 Kids! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140505.html

Irate Woman Solves Telephone Number Problem With New Motel - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140506.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - College - University - High School - Teacher/Prof - Stories

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/110_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

********** This message printed on recyclable media*********** (Think about it!)

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055

------------------------

Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

Vol 712 - July 16, 2008 - Strange 'Senior' Personal Ads

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on
each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add
"Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on
the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange QUOTES - Cowardice & Criticism

Pacifism is simply undisguised cowardice. - unknown

The coward threatens when he is safe.- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

They have vilified me, they have crucified me. Yes, they have even criticized me.- Richard J. Daley

People can be divided into two classes: those who go ahead and do something, and those who sit still and inquire, 'Why wasn't it done the other way?' - Oliver Wendell Holmes

To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. - Elbert Hubbard

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - - Senior Personal Ads

Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida newspapers:
(Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

Submitted by Kaspars

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE WWI SOLDIER FORMATIONS - 8,100 MARINES - PARIS ISLAND, SC - 1918 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/139598.html

STRANGE VEHICLES THAT RUN ON RAIL ROAD TRACKS - RAILROAD POLICE CAR - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/139770.html

CAT SLEEPING ON DOG HOUSE! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/139905.html

STRANGE GUINESS WORLD RECORDS PHOTOS - 8 - BURGER - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140265.html

COOL CUSTOM BUICK RIVIERA - GULL WING DOORS - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140318.html

THE QUEEN REVIEWS THE TROOPS - THE TINY QUEEN! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140344.html

STRANGE DOLPHIN JUMPING HIGH IN THE AIR - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140387.html

STRANGE CANADIAN GOOSE FOLLOWING MOTORIZED HANG GLIDER - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140391.html

STRANGE CRITTER - SEE MY LITTLE CRITTER BABY! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140415.html

VENUS FLY TRAP - WITH AN INSECT TRAPPED INSIDE! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140416.html

STRANGE NASA CARGO SHIP - THE GUPPY - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140474.html

AMAZING BATTLE MAP OF WWII EUROPE - PPS PRESENTATION - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140489.html

AMAZING NAVY SEALS FINAL TRIBUTE TO 'MEDAL OF HONOR' COMRADE - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140490.html

EVERYONE'S FAVORITE MOUNTAIN BIKER - PULLING A BEER KEG! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140491.html

STRANGE AIRPORT TRUCK / BUS COMBINATION - GERMANY - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140492.html

CALIFORNIA WILDFIRES - CLOSE UP VIEW OF TANKER DROPPING FIRE RETARDANT! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140493.html

RACE CAR FLIES OFF TRACK AND OVER THE FENCE! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140494.html

COOL BUILDING DEMOLITION - IMPLOSION BRINGS IT DOWN! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140495.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - PUZZLES - STRANGE ITEMS

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/100302_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

9 Things You Didn't Know About Benjamin Franklin - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/139691.html

26 Beautiful One-Liners - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/24347.html

Catholic Dictionary - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/21427.html

The Bible, as Written by Students - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/20939.html

Religious Bumper Stickers - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/20664.html

25 Church Bulletin Bloopers - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/21122.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - PUZZLES - STRANGE ITEMS

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/125_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

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Vol 712 - July 16, 2008 - Strange 'Senior' Personal Ads

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

NEW! - MySpace Members - Please NOTE that we have just added a TAB on each Joke Page and Image Page that NOW Makes it Easy for you to add "Strange" Items to your Individual MySpace pages! Just CLICK on the Bottom Right MySpace ICON! It's Quick & Easy!

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange QUOTES - Cowardice & Criticism

Pacifism is simply undisguised cowardice. - unknown

The coward threatens when he is safe.- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

They have vilified me, they have crucified me. Yes, they have even criticized me.- Richard J. Daley

People can be divided into two classes: those who go ahead and do something, and those who sit still and inquire, 'Why wasn't it done the other way?' - Oliver Wendell Holmes

To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. - Elbert Hubbard

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - - Senior Personal Ads

Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida newspapers:
(Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

Submitted by Kaspars

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE WWI SOLDIER FORMATIONS - 8,100 MARINES - PARIS ISLAND, SC - 1918 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/139598.html

STRANGE VEHICLES THAT RUN ON RAIL ROAD TRACKS - RAILROAD POLICE CAR - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/139770.html

CAT SLEEPING ON DOG HOUSE! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/139905.html

STRANGE GUINESS WORLD RECORDS PHOTOS - 8 - BURGER - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/140265.html

COOL CUSTOM BUICK RIVIERA - GULL WING DOORS - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/140318.html

THE QUEEN REVIEWS THE TROOPS - THE TINY QUEEN! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/140344.html

STRANGE DOLPHIN JUMPING HIGH IN THE AIR - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/140387.html

STRANGE CANADIAN GOOSE FOLLOWING MOTORIZED HANG GLIDER - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/140391.html

STRANGE CRITTER - SEE MY LITTLE CRITTER BABY! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140415.html

VENUS FLY TRAP - WITH AN INSECT TRAPPED INSIDE! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/140416.html

STRANGE NASA CARGO SHIP - THE GUPPY - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140474.html

AMAZING BATTLE MAP OF WWII EUROPE - PPS PRESENTATION - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/140489.html

AMAZING NAVY SEALS FINAL TRIBUTE TO 'MEDAL OF HONOR' COMRADE - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/140490.html

EVERYONE'S FAVORITE MOUNTAIN BIKER - PULLING A BEER KEG! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/140491.html

STRANGE AIRPORT TRUCK / BUS COMBINATION - GERMANY - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140492.html

CALIFORNIA WILDFIRES - CLOSE UP VIEW OF TANKER DROPPING FIRE RETARDANT! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140493.html

RACE CAR FLIES OFF TRACK AND OVER THE FENCE! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/140494.html

COOL BUILDING DEMOLITION - IMPLOSION BRINGS IT DOWN! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/140495.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - PUZZLES - STRANGE ITEMS

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/100302_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

9 Things You Didn't Know About Benjamin Franklin - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/139691.html

26 Beautiful One-Liners - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/24347.html

Catholic Dictionary - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/21427.html

The Bible, as Written by Students - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/20939.html

Religious Bumper Stickers - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/20664.html

25 Church Bulletin Bloopers - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/21122.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - PUZZLES - STRANGE ITEMS

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/125_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

==========================

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Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

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[b3ta] "The internet equivalent of a bulimic's index finger"

This Week:
* SONG - Jonti's controversial views on Gypsies
* RETRO COMPUTING - Crap celebs in pixels
* ANIMATION - Clever lollipop stick thingie

-------------------------------------------------
________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ |
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | "We're eating the
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| lard pie... together"

B3ta email 337 - 18 July 2008

Read this issue in your browser:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue337/

Subscribe: b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Unsub: b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

-------------------------------------------------

: SPONSORED LINK
Frijj Milkshakes

In a terrifying remake of the Blob a sinister
little wreaks devastation upon the picaresque
burg of Four Ridges by pouring yummy gooey
Frijj brand milkshake over it. This is the
scariest viral you will ever see, so we
recommend you wear nappies.
http://tinyurl.com/5nabyx

>> Sponsor B3ta <<
Want this space? Then talk to us.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK #1
Cowboys, Gypos and Shakin' Stevens

>> Sticky Cowboys <<
We really liked this demented piece of lolly
stick-based animation by The Brothers McLeod.
We're imagining the boys stuffing themselves
with 75 Magnums each in order to do this,
although the reality is they probably bought a
job lot of sticks off eBay. It's genuinely
creative and it piles on the gags.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U28OMnbu3W0

>> Electro Gypsy <<
We're obsessed with gypsies in B3ta HQ - the
fuhrer has been threatening to sell the B3ta
wife to those Romany types for years. So we
loved this latest piece of madness from Jonti
Picking, though we feel the video would be even
better if it had shown the leccy gypos eating a
hedgehog.
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/Electro+Gypsy/

>> 48k celebrity awards <<
B3ta wishes to apologise for this - your Ginger
Fuhrer instead of running the site properly
spent the afternoon looking up old computer
games and seeing how many pixely drawings of
crap celebs he could find. This is probably of
no interest to you unless you are from the UK
and in your 30s.
http://www.b3ta.com/features/48kcelebrityawards/

-------------------------------------------------

: QUESTION OF THE WEEK
Faking it

Each week we collect your stories, anecdotes
and lies into one handy place on the interweb.

Last week it was faking it, your guide to times
when bullshit was the only option.
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/fakingit/

* CHEESE LOLS - "A few years ago I worked for
about 10 months in a sales office in
Coventry... All the time I was there I told
everyone that I didn't like cheese. Then one
day while the manager (who, it has to be said,
was a horrible woman) was out and I was really
hungry I stole her cheese from the fridge and
ate it. When she came back she understandably
was pissed off that someone had stolen her
cheese and gave everyone a hard time about
it... except for me, because she knew I didn't
like cheese." (Professor Kenny Martin)

* FAKING CHILDHOOD BLINDNESS TO SKIVE SCHOOL (
Tourette's) - we're linking these two stories
as they're very long. Good tho. Worth a click
of anyone's mouse.
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/fakingit/post198186

* BOUGHT A ROBOT OFF THE INTERNET AND PRETENDED
THE SCHOOL HAD BUILT IT (PhillieJoe)
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/fakingit/post197242


>> This week: Best films ever <<
A few weeks back we asked about books, and it
gave us a great selection of ideas for stuff to
read, so we thought we'd try something similar
with films. (Not that we'd rapidshare them and
watch them on the laptop in bed - no sir.)
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/films/

-------------------------------------------------

: SITES IN BRIEF
Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates

>> Deaf nicknames <<
If you're around deaf people a fair amount, you
will get a sign language nickname - it's a
necessity to avoid spelling your name out every
time you're mentioned. Thing is, you don't get
to choose your own...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ouch/features/sign_names.shtml

>> Electronic dance music invented in 60s? <<
Delia Derbyshire - the woman behind the Doctor
Who theme recently died and left behind 100s of
tapes in her loft. Fascinating stuff -
including a track recorded in the 60s that
sounds identical to the noise that came from
student bedrooms in the 90s - Aphex Twin,
Autechre and all those bods.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7512072.stm

>> Pretty Flickr colour picker <<
Pleasing results from this clever page that
brings up Flickr images containing colours you
choose from a palette.
http://labs.ideeinc.com/multicolr/

>> Favicon Defenders <<
Yes, the favicon: that tiny little picture you
get to the left of the address bar in your
browser. Through some sort of mind-warping
hyper nerdery, a fully-functional version of the
arcade classic playable in your browser.
Playable, that is, if you squint.
http://snipurl.com/theworkofwitches [www_p01_org]

>> Wolfenflickr <<
Recreation of venerable shooter Castle
Wolfenstein but with your own photos adorning
the walls. And what seems like a lamentable
lack of nazis. Stick 'robmanuel' in if you like.
http://www.nihilogic.dk/labs/wolfenflickr/

>> Pencil review site <<
For the nerds its like "Yay! Pencils!" for
everyone else "Yay! Laugh at nerds!" Thus
another webby win for all.
http://www.penciltalk.org/

>> Utility kilts <<
If you are a builder and you don't like wearing
trousers then this could be right up your
alley. Nobody at all will make fun of you.
Although you should be careful going up
ladders, maybe.
http://www.utilikilts.com/?page_id=30

>> Radiohead viewer <<
Their House of Cards vid is all over YouTube but
this is better - lets you spin round Thom
Yorke's funny little face, using the laser data
from the visuals. The video, by the way, is
very reminiscent of Kraftwerk's Musique
Non Stop. Mashup anyone?
http://code.google.com/creative/radiohead/viewer.html

-------------------------------------------------

: THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO AAHH
A-Z of baby animals

An entire alphabet's-worth of cuddly cuteness.
Although it's worth noting that a few of the As
aren't all that appealing.
http://dalesdesigns.net/BA1.htm

-------------------------------------------------

: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Ceefax was better

>> Gorbie vs. zombie <<
Heartfelt heavy metal tribute to the man who
led the USSR to the consumerist promised land.
And kicked undead arse.
http://www.vimeo.com/1223566

>> Is Cake farts the new 2 girls 1 cup? <<
First there was Goatse, then there was Tubgirl,
then the broadband age brought us 2 girls 1
cup. And in the words of moogthedog, "It's
officially the end of the Internet. They should
put up a sign. Don't bother looking for
anything else... Nothing else compares to
this..." VERY VERY VERY NSFW.
http://www.cakefarts.com/

>> World's longest eyebrow <<
Repellant coverage of a bloke's bid for the
world record longest eyebrows. Close-ups of
long, stringy body hair abound. Brilliantly
pompous music throughout.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrFRo3Hmdq8

>> Little girl cheats claw game <<
Alarmingly, she does this by clambering up
inside the machinery and picking her own prize.
People are shocked, but how do you think those
things get stocked in the first place? You
can't trust a monkey not to shit down the chute.
http://www.break.com/index/little-girl-cheats-at-claw-game.html

>> Failed building demolition <<
Structure proves distressingly sturdy for a
crowd gathered to watch it get blown up. Begs
the question: who has the unenviable job of
going up there and knocking it down properly?
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Failed_building_demolition

>> Singing the puppies to sleep <<
Baby dogs prove highly susceptible to the
soothing power of song. But you must never
stop, else they wake up and cry for more.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Time_for_bed_pups_It_am_sleepy_tiem

-------------------------------------------------

: FUNNY NAME CORNER
Rimming, rape, fatties and cock

* Rim.jobs - Perverse URL forwarding from
the careers department at Research In Motion.
http://rim.jobs

* Burntherapist.com - Rough justice?
http://www.burntherapist.com/

* TOAST for fatties - "TOAST provides support
for people whose lives are affected by
obesity." If you're thinking of bingeing reach
out for TOAST.
http://www.callhelpline.org.uk/showagency.asp?ref=416

* Scotland is a crudely-drawn, spunking cock -
at least, according to the first known map of
Great Britain.
http://www.foxearth.org.uk/Maps/GoughMap_large.jpg

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK #2
MJ Hibbett, Veitch and cooking cakes in cups

>> B3ta Rock God MJ - Edinburgh show <<
Our chum MJ Hibbett this week invited us to his
new show he's taking to the Edinburgh
Festival - featuring all the amusing little
anecdotes he's prone to retelling if you go to
the pub with him. Frankly it's awesome and it
was the best night's entertainment we've quite
literally ever had. Anyway, to get you in the
mood, here's his new single which is also
featured in the show. BTW: Best story? Our
money is on the Zodiac Mindwarp one.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/It_Only_Works_Because_Youre_Here

>> Meaty moon <<
Joel's latest effort revolves around the idea
that the moon is made of meat - in this case
some rather frightening-looking mince that is
made from goose feet. Don't let this put you
off - the song and animation are great. Vintage
Veitch (we can smell it from here).
http://rathergood.com/gooses/

>> Cup cake cooking <<
A link has been doing the rounds this week
about cooking cake by plonking flour, sugar,
eggs, milk, oil and chocolate power in a cup,
microwaving then shoving fistfuls into your gob
like a greedy child. Our very own Dyer has a
go, and er, fails.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Failure_Cooking_with_Dyer

-------------------------------------------------

: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Redraw cartoons challenge results

Fraser - who normally runs our challenges is in
Iran this week - we told him not to go as the
news reports are, frankly, terrifying, but off
he's toddled. Anyway, on with the show and our
favourite entries included:

* Roobarb and Custard with Parkinson's Disease.
(Happy Toast)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8544091

* Spongebob sanitary towel. Or should that be
Spongeblob? Great marketing opportunity here.
(Joe Scaramanga)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8544993

* Homer and Marge as The Moors Murderers.
(Holly Would)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/8558326

All these images, and the highest as voted by
you can be found here:
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/cartooncrisis/

>> Low Budget Film Remakes <<
This week we want you to re-imagine Hollywood
without the cash.
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/lowbudgetfilmremakes/

-------------------------------------------------

: FRIDAY GAME
Splashback

Add fluid to the ominous, green droplets,
hopefully bursting them and clearing the screen
with ricocheting goo. BTW: Got to wonder about
the name splashback - surely that's slang for
when you piss in an urinal and it splashes your
leg. Yum.
http://www.funny-games.biz/splash-back.html

-------------------------------------------------

: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

Make something cool and tell us about it. If
you are in it then people will see your stuff.

Things we'd really like to see include

* REVERSE MUSIC - make a quiz testing whether
people can identify a tune played backwards.

* I'LL SHOW YOU MINE IF YOU'LL SHOW ME YOURS -
remember that questionswap site? What about
doing it with cocks and minges? Er..

* HERDING KITTENS - the computer game.

Send contributions via the mail form.
http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
been featured then don't be put off - we look
at everything you send us.

-------------------------------------------------

Subscribe: b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Unsubscribe: b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

-------------------------------------------------

THANKS:
This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
Stevenson. Stuff sent in by DeliriumSpong,
MrA, Superkitty, glyn, catbrain, anthony sennett,
juicygi, londoner. Additional linkage and image
challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder is QOTW
bloke. Subjlol via sepang. Click here for the
ugliest person on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/badge.php?&i...ert&format=png

-------------------------------------------------

TOP TIP:
Ants coming into your house? Watch them to see
where they path (ants will ALWAYS use the same
route unless it is obstructed), then simply draw
a line of chalk across said path. The ants will
walk up to the line and then turn back. Can
someone test this? It could make an awesome
short video. (oucheh)

-------------------------------------------------

SICKIPEDIA:
I went into Clinton cards today. I said to the
woman behind the counter, "Do you sell
bereavement cards?" She said, "Yes, sir." So I
said, "Could I exchange one for this get well
soon card I bought yesterday?
http://www.sickipedia.org/

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