VOL 1590 - APRIL 02, 2017 - You Know You Live in CA, NYC, NY, CO, Deep South

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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APRIL FUN !


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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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Strange THOUGHTFUL THOUGHTS.....

"What do people mean when they say the computer went down on me?" --Marilyn Pittman

"When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family?" --Robin Williams

"A woman broke up with me and sent me pictures of her and her new boyfriend in bed together.
Solution? I sent them to her dad." --Christopher Case

"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her." --Ellen DeGeneres

"A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket.'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too.'" --Jake Johansen

"If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either." --Dick Cavett

"Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait." --A. Whitney Brown

"I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'll forget." --Michael McShane

"Thou shall not kill. Thou shall not commit adultery. Don't eat pork. I'm sorry, what was that last one?? Don't eat pork.
God has spoken. Is that the word of God or is that pigs trying to outsmart everybody?"
--Jon Stewart

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - - You Know You Live in CA, NYC, NY, CO, Deep South

You live in California when...

1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
4. You know how to eat an artichoke.
5. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
6. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.

You live in New York City when...

1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
4. You think Central Park is "nature,"
5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
6. You've worn out a car horn.
7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.

You live in upstate New York when...

1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.

You live in the Deep South when...

1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2."ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are Ya?"
4. "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.
5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, etc.

You live in Colorado when...

1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.
3.A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.

You live in the Midwest when...

1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"

You live in Florida when...

1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind - even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.


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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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NEW MARINE CORPS RECRUITING POSTER - MELANIA TRUMP - WHITE HOUSE DUTY PLEASE! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/201773.html


STUPID CRIMINALS - MORON HUNG UP BY HIS SAGGY PANTS ON FENCE AFTER BURGLARIZING SCHOOL! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/201876.html


STRANGE ART - MONA LISA COPY PAINTED BY DaVINCI APPRENTICE 1517 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201878.html


STRANGE OLD BATHROOM PRODUCTS - TOILET PAPER HOLDER - RADIO - AND TELEPHONE!! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/201879.html


STRANGE OLD HISTORY - 1934 - MARTIN L. LAMBERT DENIED MARRIAGE LICENSE IN NEW YORK CITY TO VIOLET HILTON BECAUSE SHE HAD A CONJOINED TWIN SISTER DAISY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201881.html


STRANGE FUNERALS - CASKET IN BASS BOAT - AVID FISHERMAN BURIES DEVOTED WIFE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201883.html


GOLF MORONS - MAN AT THE EDGE OF A LAKE SWINGS, MISSES AND FALLS INTO LAKE! - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/201891.html


COOL MILITARY T-SHIRT - WE STAND FOR THE FLAG - KNEEL FOR THE FALLEN! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201892.html


STRANGE MOVIE INDUSTRY FUN - OSCAR WINNER AND LOSER FOR BEST MAKEUP AND HAIR-STYLING 2017 ! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/201893.html


BEST MAILMAN OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TO THIS CLEVER GUY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201894.html


COOL CARS - 2018 CORVETTE! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/201895.html


STRANGE KITCHEN TOOLS - WILD OPTICAL ILLUSION DESIGN WOODEN CUTTING BOARD - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201896.html


STRANGE FURNITURE - TABLE SLIDES OPEN TO REVEAL GUN STORAGE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201897.html


SCARY PHOTOS IN HISTORY - THE MAN WITH HIS DAUGHTER ON HIS SHOULDERS IS BLOWN UP BY UNKNOWN CAR BOMB NEXT TO HIM - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/201898.html


STRANGE AERIAL PHOTOS - HUGE WALRUS COLONY - MASSIVE! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/201899.html


THE KNIVES ARE OUT FOR BILL O`REILLY AT FOX - UPSET ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/201901.html


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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SM - MILITARY EQUIPMENT - ALL SHIPS - BATTLESHIPS - FRIGATES - TENDERS - DESTROYERS - CRUISERS

http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/category/100040_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

You Might Be In Education If............... - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/20213.html


Strange Baseball Injuries - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/124787.html


Understanding Australian Slang - Caution ! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/22475.html


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The Featured New Category This Week - SM - MILITARY EQUIPMENT - ALL SHIPS - BATTLESHIPS - FRIGATES - TENDERS - DESTROYERS - CRUISERS

http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/category/115_1.html

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