Dienstag, 29. April 2014

VOL 1317 - April 30, 2014 - 10 Strangest Pick Up Lines

E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com

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APRIL FUN


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Today's Featured Humor : -) - 10 Strangest Pick Up Lines


The single scene can be lots of fun, but it can also cause lots of headaches. Many of these headaches come from having to endure stupid pick up lines. Unfortunately, dumb pick up lines have been around since the Dark Ages, and they're not going away anytime soon. The most idiotic pick up lines seem to be delivered by males, for some reason. Perhaps they're more desperate than females to pick someone up, or perhaps they have a more warped sense of humor than girls do? Whatever the reason, the following are 10 of the dumbest pick up lines ever uttered.

1. Is it hot in here or is it just you?

This seems to be the hot pick up line of the moment. Suddenly you're hearing it being used on television, seeing it emblazoned across t-shirts, even hearing characters say it on children's programs. To actually use this one as a pick up line, however, you would have to be pretty desperate. Just about everyone would dismiss it as being cheesy and stupid. A good response to this line would be, "Is it cold in here or is it just me?"

2. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

Most women, upon being fed this line, would turn around and walk away from the guy speaking these arrogant words. This one has been translated into many different languages, too, which means women all around the world are having to withstand this truly boastful pick up line. A good comeback? "No, I'm Miss Wrong, sorry."

3. Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

Some have suggested that this line might actually work on women of a certain age... or, that is, teenage girls. They are the only ones who might feel flattered by such a ridiculous pick up line. The usual response to such a line from more mature women? A slap in the face. The answer to this one might be, "No, that's the shiny keys to my boyfriend's Harley parked just outside."

4. Does heaven know they're missing an angel?

This pick up line is just so obsequious and just so wrong. It could even be offensive if it was said to the wrong woman. Some people might feel that this line is sacrilegious, while others might simply think it's stupid. It's true that songs have been written about "heaven missing an angel," so leave this line to those who can make it sound lyrical and not simply like a cheesy pick up line.

5. Are those astronaut pants? Because your butt is out of this world.

Never mind the fact that this pick up line doesn't really even make sense. Astronaut pants wouldn't make anyone's butt look good, would they? Aren't they sort of big and baggy, not tight-fitting, as you'd think pants would have to fit to make your butt look good? Or does it mean your butt has recently been in outer space? I know, the logic of the pick up line is not the point --the point is that this pick up line is moronic.

6. You must be tired...because you've been running through my mind all day.

Another old, tired pick up line that your grandfather probably used on your grandmother, this line has been around since the Stone Ages. I can even recall Porky Pig using a variation of this line on a potential conquest in an old Looney Tunes cartoon. Anyone who is fed this ancient pick up line should just throw their drink in the offender's face (if you're lucky enough to be holding a drink at the time of hearing the line, that is), because it's demeaning to hear such an old line.

7. I might not be the best looking guy here, but beauty is only a light switch away!

This is one of the more recent, more gross pick up lines floating around the atmosphere. It, as well as many of the pick up lines on this list, is offensive, repulsive, abhorrent, insulting, and disrespectful. Another case in which the person on the receiving end of the line should either slap the person who feeds them the line, throw a drink in their face, or do something to show just how pissed off it has made you. The comeback for this one could be,"no, even the dark wouldn't make you look any better."

8. Good thing I brought my library card, because I'm checking you out.

Remember this line from the Mike Myers - Dana Carvey film "Wayne's World?" That gives you a clue to the mentality of this pick up line. Again, this is one that teenage girls might chuckle a bit at, but even they most likely would eventually groan as the cheesiness of this pick up line sinks in. "I'm overdue," would be a cute comeback.

9. Hey, do you have any Irish (or English etc.) in you? Do you want some?

Yet another classic pick up line, but one that is dumb nevertheless. This pick up line can be altered to fit the situation (Irish, Mexican, Spanish, English, African ... choose what works best for you!) I'm not sure if saying this pick up line to someone is worth a slap or a drink in the face, but it definitely warrants turning your back on the person who says it to you.

10. Hey, do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package!

One of the newer cheesy pick up lines, this one can be altered to fit the situation as well (Fed Ex, UPS, the USPS, pick your poison). It's a laughable, somewhat offensive pick up line that most women probably would not respond favorably to. This is also a line that wouldn't really work if it was turned around -- that is, if a woman said it to a man. I guess it could be changed to fit that situation as well... but this one is one that is best delivered by a man.


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