Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: VOL 1081 - Jan. 29, 2012

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com

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A Tribute Our French, British and American Pals!

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

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NEW FEATURE NOW AVAILABLE ON STRANGE WEBSITES - THE MOST POPULAR GROUP TOPICS/PICTURES OF THE WEEK - 30 Pictures Per Group:

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STRANGE TRAVELS - ENGLAND & IRELAND

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STRANGE BICYCLE RACING PROBLEMS - ACCIDENTS - SPILLS - FUN - TOUR de FRANCE - OLD FRANCE PIXS

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Strange Quotes on "America" and "The French"

"Americans are possibly the dumbest people on the planet. ...We Americans suffer from an enforced ignorance. We don't know about anything that's happening outside our country. Our stupidity is embarrassing." - Michael Moore

"In America, only the successful writer is important, in France all writers are important, in England no writer is important, and in Australia you have to explain what a writer is." - Geoffrey Cottrell

"America is a melting pot, the people at the bottom get burned while all the scum floats to the top." - Charlie King

The French:

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
General George S. Patton.

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
Norman Schwartzkopf.

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure"
Jacques Chirac, President of France

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee." Regis Philbin.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - You Might Be British IF..............

Being British

Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all?

Suspicion of all things foreign!

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET Coke.

Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.

And finally...

In 2000 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

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Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Sonntag, 29. Januar 2012

VOL 1081 - Jan. 29, 2012 - You Might Be British IF..............

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