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Strange Stupid Sports Quotes
1. In 2004 the Minnesota Timberwolves offered Sprewell a $21 million contract extension. The three year extension was famously rejected by Spree with these words, "I have a family to feed."
He played out his contract, having the worst statistical year of his career, and then never played in the NBA again.
2. David Beckham - When asked if he was a volatile player, the response came: "Well, I can play in the centre, on the right, and occasionally on the left side."
3. Boxer Alan Minter - "Sure, there have been injuries and deaths in boxing—but none of them serious. "
4. Ron Meyer - "It isn't like I came down from Mount Sinai with the tabloids."
5. Baseballer Andre Dawson - "I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I want all the kids to copulate me."
6. Basketballer Scotty Pippen - "He's one of the best power forwards of all time. I take my hands off to him."
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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Pilots & Mechanics With a Sense of Humor
Just in case you need a laugh:
Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one; a reassurance to those of us who fly.
After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.
By the way,UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a
200-feet-per-minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.
P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF is always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!) S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics..
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
And the best one for last
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel.
Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from the midget.
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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SM - MILITARY EQUIPMENT - STEALTH - AIRPLANES - SHIPS - SECRET EQUIPMENT - BLACK OPS
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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week
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10 Hilarious Cover Letter Blunders - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/168722.html
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The Featured New Category This Week - SM - MILITARY EQUIPMENT - STEALTH - AIRPLANES - SHIPS - SECRET EQUIPMENT - BLACK OPS
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