Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: Vol 908 - June 02, 2010 - STRANGE TESTS & QUIZES

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

FOUR NEW 'STRANGE' WEBSITES COMING SOON!!!!!!!!!!

New Utility Bar on top right and bottom of each image page which allows direct connect to 12 POPULAR Social Networking and News sites - FaceBook - MySpace - Reddit - Twitter - Digg - Stumbleupon - Yahoo - Google.

Now it's easier than ever to share and store your favorite images and jokes!

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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Strange Golf Quotes:

The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree. ~ Brian Weis

Swing hard in case you hit it. ~ Dan Marino

My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered. ~ Lord Robertson

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~ Jack Benny

There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games, one played in the air, and the other on the ground. ~ Ben Hogan

Professional golf is the only sport where if you win 20% of the time, you're the best.
~ Jack Nicklaus

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law. ~ H. G. Wells

I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers everywhere except on the course. ~ Billy Graham

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. ~ Bob Hope

While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. ~ Henny Youngman

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
~ Jack Lemmon

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. ~ Lee Trevino

I'm not saying my golf game went bad..., but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.
~ Lee Trevino

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - The Official Moron Test

1. Is there a 4th of July in England? Yes or no?

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?

3. Some months have 31 days. How many have 28?

4. How many outs are there in an inning?

5. Can a man in California marry his widow's sister?

6. Take the number 30, divide it by 1/2, and then add 10. What do you get?

7. There are 3 apples and you take two away. How many apples are you left with?

8. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half an hour. How long will the pills last?

9. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but 9 of them die. How many sheep are left?

10. How many animals of each sex did Moses bring with him on the ark?

11. A butcher in the market is 5'10" tall. What does he weigh?

12. How many 2 cent stamps are there in a dozen?

13. What was the President's name in 1960?

Here are the answers:

1. Is there a 4th of July in England? Yes or No?
...Yes. It comes right after the 3rd.

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
....One (1). You can only be born once.

3. Some months have 31 days. How many have 28?
....Twelve (12). All of them have at least 28 days.

4. How many outs are there in an inning?
... Six (6). Don't forget there is a top and bottom to every inning.

5. Can a man in California marry his widow's sister?
...No. He must be dead if it is his widow.

6. Take the number 30, divide it by 1/2, and then add 10. What do you get?
.... Seventy (70). Thirty (30) divided by 1/2 is 60.

7. There are 3 apples and you take two away. How many apples are you left with?
.Two (2). You take two apples, therefore YOU have TWO apples.

8. A doctor gives you three pills and tells you to take one every half an hour. How long will the pills last?
.....One hour. If you take the first pill at 1:00, the second at 1:30, and the third at 2:00, the pills have run out and only one hour has passed.

9. A farmer has 17 sheep. All but 9 of them die. How many sheep are left?
.... Nine (9). Like I said, all BUT nine die.

10. How many animals of each sex did Moses have on the ark?
..... None. I didn't know that Moses had an ark.

11. A butcher in the market is 5' 10 tall. What does he weigh?
.... Meat ... that is self-explanatory.

12. How many 2 cent stamps are there in a dozen?
..Twelve (12). How many eggs are in a dozen? Twelve. It's a dozen.

13. What was the President's name in 1960?
..Georgw W. Bush. As far as I know, he hasn't changed his name.

So, how did we do?

13 correct.........GENIUS...you are good.

10-12 correct....ABOVE AVERAGE...but don't let it go to your head.

7-9 correct........AVERAGE...but who wants to be average?

4-6 correct..........SLOW...pay attention to the questions!

1-3 correct..........IDIOT...what else can be said?

0 correct......CONGRATULATIONS, you are a certified MORON!

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Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Mittwoch, 2. Juni 2010

Vol 908 - June 02, 2010 - STRANGE TESTS & QUIZES - The Official Moron Test

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