Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: Vol 873 - Jan. 31, 2010

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

Time for something NEW - we never disappoint!

Trapped at the office waiting for happy hour can be a snoozefest. No more. The Toilet Paper is daily email newsletter delivers the most shocking quotes, stats, facts, and lists about one noteworthy news topic each day. Laser sharp, bust out funny, and not afraid to cross the line. Sign up to make this happy hour part of your routine.

IT'S STRANGE! CHECK IT OUT - CLICK ON THIS LINK!
http://www.thetoiletpaper.com/?ref=30215

------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange Quotes About Retirement:

I will not retire while I've still got my legs and my make-up box. - Bette Davis quotes (American actress, 1908-1989)

I have never liked working. To me a job is an invasion of privacy - Danny McGoorty Irish Pool Player

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples. - George Burns

When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. - Chi Chi Rodriguez quotes (Puerto Rican golfer, b.1935)

Nothing is more usual than the sight of old people who yearn for retirement: and nothing is so rare than those who have retired and do not regret it - Charles de Saint-Evremond

When you retire, think and act as if you were still working; when you're still working, think and act a bit as if you were already retired. - Anonymous quotes

Sooner or later I'm going to die, but I'm not going to retire. - Margaret Mead

There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. - Robert Half

Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on retirement. - Dwight Moody quotes (American evangelist 1839-1899)

The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income. - George Foreman

Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does - Anonymous

Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can't retire his experience. He must use it. Experience achieves more with less energy and time. -Bernard M. Baruch quotes (American president, financier and adviser to US presidents, 1870-1965)

Musicians don't retire; they stop when there's no more music in them. - Louis Armstrong (American leading trumpeter, 1901-1971)

There is an enormous number of managers who have retired on the job. - Peter F. Drucker

Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. - Jonathan Clements

Men seek out retreats for themselves in the country, by the seaside, on the mountains... But all this is unphilosophical to the last degree... when thou canst at a moment's notice retire into thyself. -Marcus Aelius Aurelius

The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender. - Vince Lombardi

Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on RETIREMENT. - Arthur E. Morgan

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Funny Things Said by Police

Funny Things Said by Police

1. I'm sorry Ma'am, but with the unlicensed gun in your purse plus the DWI, you ARE a real criminal.

2. Hey John, get out of the cruiser and come over here to say "Thank You." We stopped the guy who pays OUR salary!

3. Yeah, I do have bank robbers to catch, but that might be dangerous, so I'm going to play it safe and write you this ticket.

4. Hurry it up? Sure, I'll just go back to the cruiser and write the citation. Do you have food and water in the car? This shouldn't take more than six hours.

5. Do you know why I stopped you, or do you THINK like you Drive?

6. What do you mean I won't believe you? Just because you've got three kilos of smack and two bodies in the trunk doesn't mean there isn't a perfectly reasonable explanation.

7. No, you've got that WRONG. I'm even TOUGHER without the badge and gun.

8. Of course you didn't DO it. You just happened to start your wind sprints in front of the department store, the VCR is extra weight, and the security guards were providing MOTIVATION.

9. She STARTED it? That's the best you can do? My four-year-old does better than that when I ask why his sister is crying.

10. HAVE A NICE DAY.

==================================

Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Sonntag, 31. Januar 2010

Vol 873 - Jan. 31, 2010 - Funny Things Said by Police

Keine Kommentare:

Cool Stuff from Amazon

Blog-Archiv