VOL 1505 - FEB. 17, 2016 - Job Descriptions in the Real World

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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FEBRUARY FUN !


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Great "Food" Quotes

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James A. Beard

I don't eat anything that a dog won't eat. Like sushi. Ever see a dog eat sushi? He just sniffs it and says, "I don't think so." And this is an animal that licks between its legs and sniffs fire hydrants. - Billiam Coronel

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat. - Jim Davis (Garfield)

If the people have no bread, let them eat cake. - (attributed to) Marie Antoinette

I prefer Hostess fruit pies to pop-up toaster tarts because they don't require as much cooking. - Carrie Snow

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie. ~Jim Davis

A bagel is a doughnut with the sin removed. ~George Rosenbaum

I don't think America will have really made it until we have our own salad dressing. Until then we're stuck behind the French, Italians, Russians and Caesarians. ~Pat McNelis

A nickel will get you on the subway, but garlic will get you a seat. ~Old New York Proverb

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Job Descriptions in the Real World

A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain. (Mark Twain)

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.

A statistician is someone who is good with numbers but lacks the personality to be an accountant.

An actuary is someone who brings a fake bomb on a plane, because that decreases the chances that there will be another bomb on the plane.


A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.
(Charles R. Darwin)

A topologist is a man who doesn't know the difference between a coffee cup and a doughnut.

A lawyer is a person who writes a 10,000 word document and calls it a "brief."

A psychologist is a man who watches everyone else when a beautiful girl enters the room.

A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.

A schoolteacher is a disillusioned woman who used to think she liked children.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.


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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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STRANGE PLAYBOY PLAYMATES WHO BECAME CRIMINALS - TANYA BEYER- DRUG PRESCRIPTION ABUSER - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/197840.html


STRANGE TOMBSTONES & CRYPTS - KURT WAS A SOCIAL MEDIA STAR - 672 TWITTER FOLLOWERS - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/198288.html


AWESOME CUSTOM CARS - 1955 FORD BEATNIK BUBBLETOP! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/198314.html


TOOLS AND LIFE AIDES FOR SENIORS - CABLE TV REMOTE CONTROL ALTERED EASE OF USE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198315.html


STRANGE AMERICAN HISTORY - TEXAS IS THE ONLY STATE TO HAVE 6 DIFFERENT FLAGS FLY OVER IT! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198316.html


STRANGE OFFICE PROBLEMS SOLVED - LUNCH STOLEN - TRY THIS PRE-STAINED SANDWICH BAG WITH GREEN MOLD ON IT! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/198317.html


AWESOME MILITARY JET FLYING THROUGH CANYON SCREAMS PAST HIKERS LOOKING DOWN OFF RIDGE! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/198318.html


STRANGE ANIMAL FUN - CAT ENJOYS HIS OWN PRIVATE WINDOW IN SHOULD CARRY BAG - FUN ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/198319.html


STRANGE LIFE AIDS AND CHARTS - INSULT CHART PROVIDED THE PERFECT WORDS FOR EVERY OCCASION! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198320.html


MOTHER OF THE YEAR NOMINEE - HOLDS CELLPHONE WITH ONE HAND AND LEG OF DANGLING CHILD WITH THE OTHER! - GREAT! SHES AMBIDEXTROUS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198321.html


STRANGE NEW GAMES - CRAZY "KICK" BILLIARDS - WACKY POOL GAME! - FUN ACTION GIF - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198322.html


WHEN YOU STRANGE CREEPY CHILDHOOD CRUSH TURNS INTO A HOTTIE! 'WEDNESDAY" ADAMS OF THE ADAMS FAMILY! - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/198323.html


STRANGE FOOTBALL FUN - SUPERBOWL QB PAYTON MANNING - TODAY AND 20 YEARS AGO! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/198324.html


GREAT AERIAL SHOT OF MOUNT RUSHMORE OFFERS RARE VIEW OF ENTIRE ROCK FORMATION! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/198325.html


STRANGE OLDE HISTORICAL PICTURES - 1980 MOUNT ST HELENS - 1982 AFTER THE ERUPTION! - MOUNTAIN TOP GONE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198326.html


STRANGE POLICE ARRESTS - MAN STRANGLES GIRLFRIEND FOR REFUSING TO AKE YE CONTACT - SEE WHY! HA! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/198327.html


STRANGE ANIMAL FUN - WILD PIX OF LITTLE FROG RIDING THE BACK OF AN RHINO BEETLE! WOW! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/198328.html


STRANGE WATER PLANTS - EVER WONDER WHAT THE UNDERSIDE OF A HUGE LILLY PAD LOOKS LIKE? - SEE IT HERE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198329.html


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The Featured Pix Category This Week - * COOL - Airplanes - Unique - Strange - Neat Stuff

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/9_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Aussie Principle Has Had ENOUGH Of PC Teaching - New Rules! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/198286.html


- Top 11 Signs You're Flat Broke - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/118511.html


- Strange Oxymorons - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/118338.html


- Strange Science Fair Winners - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/118499.html


- Strange 'Idle Thoughts' - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/117977.html


- Strange Tech Support Horror Stories - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/117267.html


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The Featured New Category This Week - * COOL - Airplanes - Unique - Strange - Neat Stuff

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/136_1.html

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