Samstag, 26. September 2015

VOL 1464 - Sept. 27, 2015 - Strange Pilots & Mechanics With a Sense of Humor

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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September Fun !


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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

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Strange Quotes & Facts:

Enzo Ferrari told a man "You may be able to drive a tractor but you will never be able to handle a Ferrari properly." The man was so angry that he vowed to create the perfect car. His name was Ferruccio Lamborghini.

The Golden State Fence Company was hired to build a wall between the US and Mexico. They were fined five million dollars for hiring illegal immigrants to do the job.

Goats urinate on their own heads to smell more attractive to females.

Technically, snails have five anuses. In other words, they're a bunch of assholes.

More people are killed each year by flying champagne corks than by bites from poisonous spiders.

A man in Oregon was jailed and fined for collecting rainwater, which is considered "property of the state."

Cotton candy was actually invented by a dentist.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Pilots & Mechanics With a Sense of Humor

Pilots & Mechanics With a Sense of Humor

Just in case you need a laugh:
Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one; a reassurance to those of us who fly.

After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

By the way,UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a
200-feet-per-minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF is always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!) S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics..

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And the best one for last

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel.
Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from the midget.


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Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

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STRANGE ANIMAL PICTURES - SNAKES - AMAZING COBRA SKELETON ! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/196665.html


STRANGE CELEBRITY LUNACY - BRITNEY SPEARS' PREGNANCY TEST SOLD ON eBAY FOR $5001.00! - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/196671.html


STRANGE FARM & RANCH WISDOM - MESSAGE ON THE REAR OF A HORSE TRAILER TELLS IT ALL! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196641.html


1966 CHEVROLET TURBO TITAN III - CONCEPT TURBINE ENGINE AND UNIQUE STYLING - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/196675.html


FARM AND RANCH FUN - WATCH THIS COW USE ITS HEAD TO STRIP OFF THE HAY FROM THE HAY-BALE! - FUNNY ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/196676.html


CRAZY BLUE SURFER WAVE HAIR CUT FOR LITTLE KID WITH SURFER SLIPPING DOWN THE WAVE! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/196677.html


STRANGE SPORTS PRODUCTS - WHO THOUGHT THE "BULLS-EYE TARGET" ON AN UMBRELLA AT A ARCHERY RANGE THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA? - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/196678.html


WHY NEWSPAPERS ARE DYING - STUPID HEADLINE IN THIS NEWSPAPER - "WAR KILLS PEOPLE!" - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196679.html


PARKING LOT FUN - NASTY MESSAGE LEFT WITH CHALK BY PARKING MORON - I'M SPECIAL! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196680.html


STRANGE HUNTING & FISHING PIX - WILD PICTURE OF ELK WHOSE ANTLERS TORE OFF THE ANTLERS OF ANOTHER RIVAL MOOSE! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/196681.html


STRANGE FUN BUSINESS MACHINES - WILD FOOSBALL GAME THAT DISPENSES TASTY GUMBALLS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196682.html


STRANGE COLLEGE FOOTBALL FUN - THE MINNESOTA GOLDEN GOPHERS DISTRACT OPPOSING KICKERS WITH HUGE GOPHER PICTURE ON JUMBOTRON! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/196685.html


STRANGE PARK DESIGNS - WHO THOUGHT DIRECTING THE BOTTOM OF THE SLIDE INTO TRAFFIC WAS A GOOD IDEA? - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196684.html


STRANGE MILITARY PHOTOS - WILD ACTION SHOT OF MORTAR PROJECTILE EXITING THE TUBE WITH EXPLODING GASES! - WOW! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/196686.html


COOL AERIAL PHOTOS - GREAT SHOT OF FROZEN CANADIAN LAKE - ICE ROAD TRUCKER SLIDES OVER THE FROZEN HIGHWAY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196687.html


STRANGE OLDE HISTORICAL PICTURES - US PRESIDENT JOHN F KENNEDY WITH LBJ AND HIS SECURITY ADVISERS DURING THE 1962 CUBAN MISSILE CRISIS - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/196688.html


THE CATHOLIC POPE IS COMING TO NEW YORK CITY - EVEN THE DOGS ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO IT! - FUNNY RELIGIOUS PIXS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196694.html


LUCKIEST ARAB IN THE WORLD! - GLASS WINDOW PANEL DROPS OFF SKYSCRAPER NEARLY SLICING MAN IN HALF! - AMAZING ACTION GIF! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/196711.html


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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SF - G - FARM ANIMALS - CRITTERS - GOOD & BAD - RABBITS - BUNNIES - FOX - COYOTE - MISC.

http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/100758_1.html

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The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- Paraprosdokians - Great Word Fun! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/196547.html


- Strange Little Known Texas Facts - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/172271.html


- Only In TEXAS! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/172270.html


- Strange "Other" Uses For Toothpaste - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/168717.html


- Strange Things to Ponder - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/168737.html




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The Featured New Category This Week - SF - G - FARM ANIMALS - CRITTERS - GOOD & BAD - RABBITS - BUNNIES - FOX - COYOTE - MISC.

http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/102_1.html

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