VOL 1040 - Sept. 07, 2011 - Strange Toronto Man Hits Fun But Useless Milestone

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Strange Quotes on Incompetents:

Incompetents invariably make trouble for people other than themselves.
Larry McMurtry (1936 - ), 'Lonesome Dove'

Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.
Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988), The Peter Principle (1969), chapter 1

Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)

Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Farlie, Texas:

(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.

Y'all git all that?
Lord, keep Your arm around my shoulder
and Your hand over my mouth.

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Strange Toronto Man Hits Fun But Useless Milestone

March, 2011

Ok, from the archives of 'who really cares' and 'buddy get a life' we have Canada's "Pub Guy" Bill Perrie who has a dream job that allows him to travel around the country in search of bars to drink his favorite brew.

Perrie, 53, of Stouffville, Ont., located 50 km northeast of Toronto, was nursing a cold one at one of his favorite watering holes in the city, the Firkin on King, on Thursday to mark his 2,500 bar visit.

He was accompanied by friends and fellow beer aficionados who openly profess their love for suds.

"It has been a labour of love," said Perrie, who has written seven books on Canadian pubs. "The people is what makes a good pub great."

Perrie, who has an Internet radio show and is a columnist for Pub Magazine, has been traveling the country since 1999 checking out pubs. He has racked up thousands of kilometers in search of "hidden gems."

"I did not set out to visit as many pubs as I could," Perrie said. "I am always on a quest to find great local and hidden gems."

His interest in pubs date back to his days in Scotland, where "bars were like a community center that people attended everyday after work to catch up with friends." Firkin general manager Dan Targonsky said Perrie could have gone to any the GTA's 2,500 pubs to mark his milestone visit.

OK, maybe I am just a tad jealous of this guys job, aren't you?

==================================

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STRANGE MILITARY AIRCRAFT - C-130 HERCULES CARGO PLANE WITH SNOW SKI'S ON! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/177856.html

X-1 BEING LOADED ON B-50 SUPERFORTRESS - 1951 - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/178276.html

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==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - CARS - TRUCKS - MOTORCYCLES - BOATS - ALL KINDS OF VEHICLES

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==================================

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The 20 Strangest Flavors of Japanese Ice Cream - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/142150.html

20 Strange Alternative Uses for Vodka! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/143134.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - CARS - TRUCKS - MOTORCYCLES - BOATS - ALL KINDS OF VEHICLES

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/category/111_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites

Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/

Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/

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Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/

Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/

Videos - Action Gif's - PPS Presentations - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/

Vacations - Travel - Trips - http://www.strangevacations.com/

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VOL 1039 - Sept. 04, 2011 - Strange Labor Day History - (Reformated So You Can Read It!)

Sorry About The ReSend - Fat Fingers!

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

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VOL 1039 - Sept. 04, 2011 - Strange Labor Day History

==================================

Strange Quotes:

"Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound." - Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange Street Food Farm

"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious." - Alan Minter, Boxer

"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness." - Alicia Silverstone, Actress

"How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby." - Anonymous Manufacturer

"This is no longer a slum neighborhood. I haven't heard of a Cubs fan being shot in a long time." - Anonymous Wrigley Field Neighbor, Chicago, IL

"During the scrimmage, Tarkanian paced the sideline with his hands in his pockets while biting his nails." - AP report describing Fresno State basketball coach Jerry Tarkanian

"Two grand slams in a week - man, that's seven or eight ribbies right there." - Bill Madlock, Baseball broadcaster

"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl." - Bill Peterson, football coach

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - Labor Day History

Labor Day History

Some countries spell it Labor day, while others spell it Labour day

The holiday originated in Canada out of labor disputes ("Nine-Hour Movement") first in Hamilton, then in Toronto, Canada in the 1870s, which resulted in a Trade Union Act which legalized and protected union activity in 1872 in Canada. The parades held in support of the Nine-Hour Movement and the printers' strike led to an annual celebration in Canada. In 1882, American labor leader Peter J. McGuire witnessed one of these labor festivals in Toronto. Inspired from Canadian events in Toronto, he returned the USA, to New York and organized the first American "labor day" on September 5 of the same year.

Most countries celebrate Labour Day on May 1, known as May Day and International Workers' Day.

Bermuda, Canada and the United States celebrate labour day on the first Monday of September.

In some Caribbean nations, a labour holiday is provided on the first Monday of May. In Australia, Queensland and the Northern Territory follow this policy.

Labour day Quotes:

Labor Day differs in every essential from other holidays of the year in any country. All other holidays are in a more or less degree connected with conflict and battles of man's prowess over man, of strife and discord for greed and power, of glories achieved by one nation over another. Labor Day is devoted to no man, living or dead, to no sect, race or nation.
– Samual Gempers .

Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken.
– Bill Dodds .

==================================

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AMAZING CELEBRITY RIDES - CUSTOM LUXURY CARS - NICHOLAS CAGE - FERRARI ENZO - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/177235.html

SURFING FUN - COOL SURFBOARD MIDAIR FLIP - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178067.html

VERY RARE & UNUSUAL WW II PHOTOS FOUND IN OLD SOLDIERS CAMERAS - USS PHILLIPINES SEA - 1945 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177113.html

HORSE PULLING LOG KICKS MORON WITH A STICK! - OUCH! - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/177802.html

SURFING DANGERS - GIRLS CARRYING SURFBOARD DOWN MUDDY ROAD ABOUT TO GET SPLASHED BIG TIME! - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/178070.html

OLDE COMMERCIAL TRUCK - MINTIES - THE UNIVERSAL SWEET - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/177614.html

LOW FLYING CAMOUFLAGED MILITARY JET LAUNCHES MISSILE - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/178081.html

STRANGE CROSS COUNTRY BICYCLIST ON RAILROAD TRACKS WITH SIDE CAR TYPE TRAILER - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177314.html

CUSTOM PAINTED GREEN VW VAN - CHROME MAG WHEELS - A 1970'S DREAM! - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/178283.html

STRANGE EASTER ISLAND STATUES HAVE HUGE LONG BASES UNDERGROUND! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/178286.html

STRANGE OLDE DOUBLE DECKER BUS - SAN ANTONIO - ST MARY'S UNIVERSITY TEXAS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178288.html

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STRANGE OLDE SINGLE MAN HELICOPTER HOVERING OVER WATER - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178292.html

TOP SECRET NAVY STEALTH BOAT - INVISIBLE! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/178301.html

==================================

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==================================

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Strange Vietnam War Memorial Wall Facts - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/178269.html

Strange Business One Liners - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/107505.html

Labor Day Humor - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/178314.html

Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Corporate America - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/178315.html

Dilbert Quotes - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/21364.html

Limericks from and for Geeks - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/21019.html

Computer Acronyms - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/20604.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SF - G - INTERNATIONAL FARMS - FOREIGN FARMS - CROPS - ASIA - EUROPE

http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/111_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites

Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/

Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/

Racing! - F1 - NASCAR - Dirt Bikes - http://www.strangeracer.com/

Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/

Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/

Videos - Action Gif's - PPS Presentations - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/

Vacations - Travel - Trips - http://www.strangevacations.com/

==========================

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#1 Stranger

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VOL 1039 - Sept 04, 2011 - 5 Strange But True Stories in Australia

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - ---------------------

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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet? Get ready to jump into something "Strange!" http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html VOL 1038 - Aug 31, 2011 - 5 Strange But True Stories in Australia ================================== Strange Quotes: "Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound." - Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange Street Food Farm "Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious." - Alan Minter, Boxer "I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness." - Alicia Silverstone, Actress "How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby." - Anonymous Manufacturer "This is no longer a slum neighborhood. I haven't heard of a Cubs fan being shot in a long time." - Anonymous Wrigley Field Neighbor, Chicago, IL "During the scrimmage, Tarkanian paced the sideline with hi
s hands in his pockets while biting his nails." - AP report describing Fresno State basketball coach Jerry Tarkanian "Two grand slams in a week - man, that's seven or eight ribbies right there." - Bill Madlock, Baseball broadcaster "Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl." - Bill Peterson, football coach ================================== Today's Featured Humor : -) - Labor Day History Labor Day History Some countries spell it Labor day, while others spell it Labour day The holiday originated in Canada out of labor disputes ("Nine-Hour Movement") first in Hamilton, then in Toronto, Canada in the 1870s, which resulted in a Trade Union Act which legalized and protected union activity in 1872 in Canada. The parades held in support of the Nine-Hour Movement and the printers' strike led to an annual celebration in Canada. In 1882, American labor leader Peter J. McGuire witnessed one of these labor festivals in Toronto. Inspire
d from Canadian events in Toronto, he returned the USA, to New York and organized the first American "labor day" on September 5 of the same year. Most countries celebrate Labour Day on May 1, known as May Day and International Workers' Day. Bermuda, Canada and the United States celebrate labour day on the first Monday of September. In some Caribbean nations, a labour holiday is provided on the first Monday of May. In Australia, Queensland and the Northern Territory follow this policy. Labour day Quotes: Labor Day differs in every essential from other holidays of the year in any country. All other holidays are in a more or less degree connected with conflict and battles of man's prowess over man, of strife and discord for greed and power, of glories achieved by one nation over another. Labor Day is devoted to no man, living or dead, to no sect, race or nation. – Samual Gempers . Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It w
ould have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken. – Bill Dodds . ================================== Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix ================================== STRANGE TOYS & GAMES - CHESS SETS - BATMAN & ROBIN - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/177023.html OLDE HYDROPLANE RACING - 'MY SIN' LOADED ABOARD CUSTOM HAULER - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177070.html OLDE HYDROPLANE RACING 1950'S - PIT AREA - PANORAMA - (COLOR) - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/177074.html AMAZING CELEBRITY RIDES - CUSTOM LUXURY CARS - NICHOLAS CAGE - FERRARI ENZO - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/177235.html SURFING FUN - COOL SURFBOARD MIDAIR FLIP - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangevacations.com/content/item/178067.html VERY RARE & UNUSUAL WW II PHOTOS FOUND IN OLD SOLDIERS CAMERAS - USS PHILLIPINES SEA - 1945 - http://www.strangemedical.com/content/item/177113.html HORSE PULLING LOG KICKS MORON WITH A STICK!
- OUCH! - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/177802.html SURFING DANGERS - GIRLS CARRYING SURFBOARD DOWN MUDDY ROAD ABOUT TO GET SPLASHED BIG TIME! - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/178070.html OLDE COMMERCIAL TRUCK - MINTIES - THE UNIVERSAL SWEET - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/177614.html LOW FLYING CAMOUFLAGED MILITARY JET LAUNCHES MISSILE - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/178081.html STRANGE CROSS COUNTRY BICYCLIST ON RAILROAD TRACKS WITH SIDE CAR TYPE TRAILER - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/177314.html CUSTOM PAINTED GREEN VW VAN - CHROME MAG WHEELS - A 1970'S DREAM! - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/178283.html STRANGE EASTER ISLAND STATUES HAVE HUGE LONG BASES UNDERGROUND! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/178286.html STRANGE OLDE DOUBLE DECKER BUS - SAN ANTONIO - ST MARY'S UNIVERSITY TEXAS - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/178288.html STRANGE ORNATE PEARL HANDLE
D KNIFE GUN - BEAUTIFUL WEAPON - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/178290.html STRANGE JAPANESE CREW CUT - SQUARED OFF SHAG TYPE HAIR STYLE - AMAZING - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/178291.html STRANGE OLDE SINGLE MAN HELICOPTER HOVERING OVER WATER - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/178292.html TOP SECRET NAVY STEALTH BOAT - INVISIBLE! - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/178301.html ================================== The Featured Pix Category This Week - SF - G - INTERNATIONAL FARMS - FOREIGN FARMS - CROPS - ASIA - EUROPE http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/100750_1.html ================================== The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week Strange Vietnam War Memorial Wall Facts - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/178269.html Strange Business One Liners - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/107505.html Labor Day Humor - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/178314.html Everything I Need t
o Know I Learned in Corporate America - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/178315.html Dilbert Quotes - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/21364.html Limericks from and for Geeks - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/21019.html Computer Acronyms - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/20604.html ================================== The Featured New Category This Week - SF - G - INTERNATIONAL FARMS - FOREIGN FARMS - CROPS - ASIA - EUROPE http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/category/111_1.html ================================== Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/ Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/ Racing! - F1 - NASCAR - Dirt Bikes - http://www.strangeracer.com/ Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/ Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/ Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents -
http://www.strangefunkidz.com/ Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/ Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/ Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/ All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/ Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/ Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/ Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/ Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/ Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/ Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/ Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/ Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/ Videos - Action Gif's - PPS Presentations - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/ Vacations - Travel - Trips - http://www.strange
vacations.com/ ========================== Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow! #1 Stranger --------------------- HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED! Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055 ------------------------ Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

[b3ta] "The world's premiere Colonel Gadaffi fanzine"

 

This Week:
* POSSIBLY - "Margaret Thatcher has eaten my sperm"
* KLF - Google map
* CUTE - Otters and kittens

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B3ta email 494 - 2 Sept 2011

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We've recently realised we can buy interesting
boozes on Amazon and get them delivered to the
house. Our favourite is probably the coffee
flavoured Kahlua as you can use to make Black
Russians (add vodka), White Russians (add vodka
& cream) or even a Black Irish (add whiskey).
Basically you can be an utter alcoho-tramp but
pretend it's some kind of exploration of taste
sensations. Wonderful stuff. *Hick*
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0043AACZQ/b3ta-21

>> Sponsor B3ta <<
Want this space? Then talk to us.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
Clive, KLF, Signs, Catslugs and Acid

>> KLF Google Map <<
"I made a KLF Google map," boasts Drew Badly. "I
say 'made', I compiled it. I got snowed in and
the locations just kept on getting added." An
obscure and peculiar guide to the movements of
the cult 90s group. Right up our street. A-ha,
a-ha.
http://g.co/maps/5yzf

>> When Clive Was Alive <<
"When Clive Was Alive is a lovely little song I
done," intimates Joel Veitch. "S'animated by Lee
Hardcastle innit." Grisly cuteness.
http://b3ta.com/links/When_Clive_Was_Alive

>> Signs 2 <<
Road signs come to life, in this charming little
film from Black Moon. "It took much longer than
I expected it to," he says. "But when you've
started..."
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Signs_2

>> Catslugs Episode 1 <<
"Here's an episode from a weekly series I'm
making, called Catslugs," explains
grape-productions. "I've found people like
watching cute things in pain." Either he's found
the formula for web viral gold, or this is how
people start out as serial killers.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Catslugs_E01_Seed

>> Acid Relief <<
"This is a compilation of acid house, techno,
rave, and electro I've helped put together to
raise money for the DEC's East Africa Famine
Relief work," writes Mildred. "Some great new
tracks from artists such as LFO, Luke Vibert,
Ben Sims and Slipmatt. It's completely free to
download, you can choose to pay what you want or
donate directly via just giving." Enjoy some 303
techno and it's all for charidee...
http://balkanvinyl.bandcamp.com/album/acid-relief

-------------------------------------------------

: QUESTION OF THE WEEK
Overheard Secrets

Like a geeky Echelon triggering on "pregnant"
and "not the father" rather than "bomb", it
seems you've heard it all:
http://b3ta.com/questions/overheard/

* DINNER AND A SHOW - "Sitting in a pub having a
quiet schnitzel and chips with the missus when a
couple walked in and took a table around the
corner from us. The shape of the restaurant area
meant they clearly didn't think anyone was near
them and we'd not said anything as we were
eating. "Look before we order, I want to tell
you something," she said. "I was pregnant, but
I'm not anymore. As of this last week." And so
it began. Girl had been pregnant, guy outraged
he'd not been told. Girl counters with they'd
been broken up for the past month and she didn't
know if they were ever getting back together,
Guy consoles with how horrible for you to go
through that alone. Girl reveals abortion, Guy
returns to outraged. Girl reveals Guy not the
father, Guy advances to apoplectic, Girl only
slept with someone else because she'd found out
about Guy and Girl's best friend. Guy ashamed.
Girl admits Girl only with Guy now to hurt him,
Guy only with Girl now to win her back. Girl
didn't love Guy at all, Guy only loved Girl.
Girl cried and said Girl really loved him too,
Guy said, "Ha!" I lied. I don't really love
you." Girl uses bad word, Guy dashes down
cutlery... and a woman walked up to say, "Hi
there, just wondering if you'd like to take part
in the trivia contest later? Here's a pen and...
oh, have I come at a bad time?" Trivia lady
left, Guy stormed off and Girl, with a defiant
snort, got up to leave as well... and saw us
sitting there, slack-jawed, with a fork still
halfway to our mouths from when they'd started
five minutes before." (difficultchild)

* CLOSETTY - "I was drinking in a fairly nice
pub in Manchester. Getting a round in, I ended
up stood at the bar next to two horrible-looking
blokes - you know the type: would probably list
their job as "security consultant", steroid
pumped muscles, too much jewellery, all that...
Successful drug-dealers, basically. I was trying
to shuffle away from them a little, lest I be
accused of looking at their pint, when: #1 "I
think Dave might be gay" #2 "Dave who? Our Dave?
No way?" "Yeah, our Dave. I really think he is."
"What the fuck makes you say that?" "Well, we
were out on the lash the other night and we
pulled some student bird. We took her back to my
place and we were splitting her, like. I was
giving her a good piping when Dave suddenly
stuck his cock up my arse!" "Fucking hell!"
"Yeah..." "What did you do then?" "Well, I kinda
liked it..." (ScousersPet)

* VISTA - "A tiny, shrivelled, possibly mad, old
woman being pushed in a wheelchair by her carer
towards the beach some 200 yards from her
seafront nursing home, declared as they passed
where I was sitting minding my own business, "Oh
not the fucking sea again..." The majestic
wildebeest presumably being busy elsewhere."
(LisawithoutaC)

>> This Week's Question: Hell <<
Tell us about the times you've been to a place
of worship, and, naturally, how you are now
consigned to the everlasting fires of Hell:
http://b3ta.com/questions/church/

-------------------------------------------------

: SITES IN BRIEF
Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates

>> Please please let this be true <<
Interview with Chuck Palahniuk. Check out the
anecdote under the heading 'Galvanising a
Generation'. Clue - search for "Margaret
Thatcher has eaten my sperm."
http://www.shortlist.com/entertainment/films/chuck-palahniuk

>> Spot the IT Guy <<
Clue, he's the guy with the sexy face that all
the girls love.
http://bit.ly/qJCv1V

>> The War of The Worlds Musical as a Book<
If your day is flagging a bit then you haven't
stuck on Jeff Wayne's Musical Version of The War
of The Worlds yet. Do it. And to get you in the
mood - read this:
http://t.co/2pirwvv

>> We *heart* Blade runner <<
A Tumblr dedicated to stuff about Blade Runner,
before Ridley Scott ruins it again.
http://1187hunterwasser.tumblr.com

>> Playing twitter at it's own game <<
An archive of Scots comedian @DaftLimmy trying to
lose 1000 followers in 24 hours.
http://t.co/I9DBOJk

-------------------------------------------------

: THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO AAHH
Otters and kittens

Popbitch will have a anal orgasm when it sees
this:
http://t.co/F1w1cae

-------------------------------------------------

: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Like a Casio video watch but on your PC

>> "Don't jump, Edward" <<
Unexpected resolution to toddler drama.
http://t.co/39k3vJR

>> Sexy hiking dance <<
Rambling man can't believe this feast for the
eyes, during a walk in the hills. What on earth
is going on? Less sexist than we assumed at
first.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/if_you_go_down_to_the_woods_today:2

>> Half-ass Jackass <<
Posse of edgy New Zealanders set out to prove
that their TV is every bit as exciting as the US
version. Brilliant - more enjoyable than the
original.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/New_Zealands_version_of_Jackass

>> Like a BUS! <<
The driver of route 62 just does not give a fuck.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Like_a_BUS

>> Cat takes out impostor <<
Bert the cat freaks out! This is why Invasion of
the Bodysnatchers didn't have them impersonate
cats. One of the reasons.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Bert_The_Cat_Takes_Out_The_Kitteh_Imposter

>> 'Sextape' by Smearballs <<
Incredible editing skills used to inventively
eliminate even the faintest whiff of sense from
US daytime TV. With Whoopi Goldberg. Amazing
stuff.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Whoopi_Goldberg_in_Sextape_by_Smearballs

>> Chatbot vs. Chatbot <<
Two AIs left to their own conversation,
resulting in surrealist lols.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnzlbyTZsQY

-------------------------------------------------

: FUNNY NAME CORNER
Two-thirds watertight this week

* 15 PRODUCTS MADE UNINTENTIONALLY OFFENSIVE BY
CARELESS STICKER PLACEMENTS - we're guessing the
word 'unintentionally' is misused. (via
@rmt_1982)
http://bit.ly/oRqfJW

* OUR NEW FAVOURITE TENNIS PLAYER - Jack Sock.
(via Rollerjooster)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Sock

* FISH AND LIES - we're unsure about the
accuracy of this slogan - spotted in a fish and
chip shop we visited in Hastings.
http://yfrog.com/h0meycvj

-------------------------------------------------

: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Results from the Disney Challenge

Last week we wanted you to show us the dark side
of Disney.

Your favourites included:

* SMUG - internal B3ta meme pitches for Pixar
(Ninj)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10519339

* PASTA - the lady is much more of a tramp than
anyone thought (maiden)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10521284

* HAIR - golden pubis thatch extension splendour
(taters)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10517696

All these images, and the highest as voted by
you can be found here:
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/notdisney/

>> New challenge: Sexy Everyday Objects <<
Take a photo of everyday objects you've caught
in compromising positions. Animating is
optional, we just want to see the filthy buggers
at it. Challenge suggested by HappyToast.
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/everydaysexy/

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Follow-ups on previous stories.

* WIKIBITUARIES - last week we asked for a bank
of crowdsourced obituaries, hopefully to get
Z-listers to quit wasting their lives. Dave
Gardiner has worked hard to oblige our whims.
There's a few already in there, but please roll
up your sleeves and get stuck in, if you have
the celeb-venom to spare.
http://www.wikibituraries.com/index.php?title=Main_Page

* REMOVING VOCALS - Mystery Bob writes, "In
response to Kael's request in the newsletter,
there is a way to sort-of remove vocals from
things. I wrote about it here."
http://robbielesiuk.com/?p=253

BTW: matthewpettyuk also asks, "Could someone
also do the same for Radiohead? Yorke's voice
does my bleeding head in."

* SAGE ADVICE - Freakmandu writes, "Your recent
top tip (ants and talc) is fine, but if the ants
are coming into the kitchen I always use a sprig
of sage. Ants hate the smell of it, and it
smells much more appropriate for a kitchen than
talc." We tell you what ants also hate: fire. A
burning kitchen has no ants.

* COMMERCIAL WORK FOR CYRIAK - He writes,
"Here's another video I did for Trident.This one
features a giant polar bear wearing red speedos,
of course." We demand that ad people let Cyriak
use his own music. DEMAND!
http://youtu.be/Vnm2fiLjN10

-------------------------------------------------

: FRIDAY GAME
300 Lines

A collaborative drawing app that shows the last
300 lines draw. @user24 writes, "I'm telling
you, once there are a few users on it, it goes
totally mental."
http://300lin.es

ALSO INTERESTING - but not something you can
play in your browser is the stabyourself guys
who are taking classic games and remixing them -
Tetris with real world physics and Mario with
Portal style shenanigans.
http://stabyourself.net/nottetris2/

-------------------------------------------------

: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

Make something cool and tell us about it. If
you are in it then people will see your stuff.

Things we'd really like to see include *looks
round kitchen for random inspiration*

* MEATY SUBSTITUTES FOR VEGETABLES - why should
vegetarians have all the fun with Quorn? We want
carrots made of beef.

* CHEESE LIQUEUR - surely some genius can
combine fromage and alcohol into something that
makes you simultaneously fat and drunk?

* ACORN PANCAKES - apparently if you blanch
acorns in boiling water you can remove the
bitterness, then grind them down and make flour.
We can't be arsed to do this but we think of it
every time we see oak trees. Now you will too.
You bunch of squirrels.

Send contributions via the mail form.
http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
been featured then don't be put off - we look
at everything you send us.

-------------------------------------------------

Subscribe: b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Unsubscribe: b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

-------------------------------------------------

THANKS:
This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
Stevenson. Stuff sent in by @bounder, The
Archduke of South London, planearm, dirtyscarab,
irongibbon, editorialgirl, WiL, Newshack,
johnsto, @DTL, TownsendsPublisher, @deltorro01,
@edwardrussia, @DFLamont, @cookdandbombd. Top
Tippery by robneymcplum. Additional linkage and
image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder is
QOTW bloke. Subjlols via Stallion_Explosion.

-------------------------------------------------

TOP TIP:
Sushi tastes much better cooked. Possibly with
chips, also cooked.

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VOL 1038 - Aug 31, 2011 - 5 Strange But True Stories in Australia

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

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http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

VOL 1038 - Aug 31, 2011 - 5 Strange But True Stories in Australia

==================================

Strange Quotes: Famous Curses!

May your every wish be granted. - Ancient Chinese Curse

May your left ear wither and fall into your right pocket. - Arab Curse

May those that love us, love us;
and to those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts;
and if He doesn't turn their hearts,
may He turn their ankles
so we'll know them by their limping.
- - - Old Irish Toast

May you wander over the face of the earth forever, never sleep twice in the same bed, never drink water twice from the same well, and never cross the same river twice in a year. - Traditional Gypsy Curse

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - 5 Strange But True Stories in Australia

5 Strange But True Stories in Australia

Read on for the top five most bizarre but true stories recently reported around Australia.

Water Buffalo Takes the Plunge!
Earlier this month, a Howard Springs man finished mowing his lawn and noticed a water buffalo casually strolling up the driveway. Karl Stowers was stunned as he watched it jump in his pool and swim. Mr. Stowers yelled at it to no avail and then lured the beast out of the pool with food. It proceeded to run across his freshly mowed lawn and roll around in a mud puddle. The buffalo may be the same one spotted strolling around in the yards of other Howard Springs' residents.

Love Soars to New Heights!
A few days after Christmas, a North Cairns police officer heard voices from above and spotted two people climbing down a crane access ladder over a construction site. Elisha Walker and Nigel Meighan were each recently released on a good behaviour bond after they plead guilty to the stunt. Mr. Meighan told the magistrate it was just a silly thing he and Walker thought up when they saw the crane, and they had not considered the consequences since they were drunk at the time.

Praying Mantis Becomes a Video Star!
A Brisbane couple, Maria and Rod Thompson, has captured amazing video of a praying mantis chasing a computer mouse cursor around the screen. Mrs. Thompson said the mantis was seen in the home before, and one night it poked its head over the computer as her husband was checking email. When the mouse was bumped, the praying mantis surprised them by leaping at the cursor. This began a twenty-minute game, and the couple filmed the unusual spectacle that can now be seen on YouTube.

Truck Driver Gets Stuck on the Phone!
43-year-old Darwin truck driver, Gye Gardner, broke his mobile phone's headset and repaired it with superglue. His boss called before it dried, and it stuck to his ear. He said he usually kept the headset in his ear most of the day, and friends even jokingly suggested that he leave it stuck and plug his ear into the power point at night to charge the headset. Gardner scraped the earpiece from his ear but several pieces of skin were left stuck to the headset. He said removing it was painful, but it did not hurt as much as his pride!

Man is all Thumbs!
Semi-retired gun salesperson and firearms inspector, Geoff McLaren, now has his thumb replaced by his left big toe after his thumb was blown off in a recent workplace accident. Surgeons at Sydney Hospital performed the delicate microsurgery. McClaren says he loves to wear sandals, so a missing toe may cramp his style just a bit!

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE TOYS & GAMES - CHESS SETS - AL QAEDA VERSION - JETS VS SKYSCRAPERS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177026.html

STRANGE TRAVEL ADVENTURES - HELICOPTER FIND FLAT SPOT TO LAND ON HUGE ICEBERG! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/177201.html

HARD ROCKERS CURSE - ALL DEAD AT AGE 27! - JIMMY HENDIXS - SEPT 18, 1970 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177566.html

KILT WEARING GROOM IRKS BRIDE AT SCOTTISH WEDDING - FIGHTS AND ARREST FOLLOW! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/176638.html

SNORKELING SWIMMERS VIEW TWO HUGE WHALES! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/176646.html

SURFING DANGERS - HUGE SURF RESULTS IN MANY EMPTY SURF BOARDS - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/177688.html

STRANGE BRASS KNUCKLES STUN GUN - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/178282.html

WEATHER DANGERS - LIGHTHOUSE ENVELOPED BY HUGE CRASHING WAVE - WOW! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/178284.html

STRANGE FARM FIELD FUN - HUGE INDIAN CHIEF HEAD - AMAZING - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/178285.html

STRANGE VEHICLE ACCESSORIES AND PARTS - 1954 MERCEDES BENZ 300 SL GULLWING - FOLDING STEERING WHEEL - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/177617.html

STRANGE MILITARY AIRCRAFT - GLOBAL HAWK UAV - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178088.html

STRANGE MILITARY AIRCRAFT - FOREIGN JET - STRANGE PAINT JOB! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/177854.html

STRANGE OLDE TOYS - GILBERT HALL OF SCIENCE ATOMIC ENERGY LAB - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/177924.html

CONSTRUCTION DANGERS - MAN SHOVELS DIRT INTO PICKUP RUN WHEN EARTHEN LEDGE COLLAPSES AND BURIES TRUCK - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178255.html

STRANGE FARM FIELD ANIMALS - ELEPHANT AND BUNNY WITH CAKE! - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/176654.html

OLDE ROCKER DEBBIE HARRY WITH ANDRE' THE GIANT - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/178266.html

F-18 LAUNCHES A DOZEN SWIRLING MISSILES - AMAZING - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/178270.html

F-22 - STRANGE RAINBOW FORMED OFF VAPOR TRAILS - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/178277.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SS - FOOTBALL - NFL - COLLEGE - STAR PLAYERS

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/100020_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Why Teachers Drink.......... - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178300.html

You Might be From Las Vegas if… - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/155537.html

You Know You're From Canada When... - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/155539.html

You Might be From Colorado if... - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/155540.html

Strange Laws in Kentucky - Iowa - Illinois - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/162801.html

Strange Things I Learned Being Raised in Missouri - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/165570.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SS - FOOTBALL - NFL - COLLEGE - STAR PLAYERS

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/109_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites

Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/

Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/

Racing! - F1 - NASCAR - Dirt Bikes - http://www.strangeracer.com/

Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/

Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/

Videos - Action Gif's - PPS Presentations - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/

Vacations - Travel - Trips - http://www.strangevacations.com/

==========================

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

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------------------------

Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

VOL 1037 - Aug 28, 2011 - Top 20 OxyMorons - Strange

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Check out The End of Summer Specials!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

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------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

==================================

Strange Quotes About Food:

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish. - Timothy Jones

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead. - Woody Allen

There are five elements: earth, air, fire, water and garlic. - Louis Diat

Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. - Garrison Keillor

A cucumber should be well sliced, and dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out, as good for nothing. - Samuel Johnson

There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who love chocolate, and communists. - Leslie Moak Murray in "Murray's Law"

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - - Top 20 OxyMorons

20. Government Organization

19. Alone Together

18. Personal Computer

17. Silent Scream

16. Living Dead

15. Small Crowd

14. Taped Live

13. Plastic Glasses

12. Tight Slacks

11. Peace Force

10. Pretty Ugly

9. Head But

t8. Working Vacation

7. Tax Return

6. Virtual Reality

5. Dodge Ram

4. Work Party

3. Hard Water

2. Healthy Tan

1. Microsoft Works

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

SPORTS FUN - DIVERS AND THEIR FUNNY FACES ! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/177176.html

OLDE COCA COLA MARKETING SIGNS - CAMPAIGNS & VEHICLES - 1920 CORNER DRUG STORE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177765.html

STRANGE OLDE & NEW CITY GROWTH - SEOUL KOREA - 2010 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177407.html

STRANGE OLDE & NEW CITY GROWTH - SEOUL KOREA - 1960 - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177408.html

KODA - THE MINIATURE DWARF HORSE FROM AUSTRALIA - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/177052.html

SNEAKY CAT GOES AFTER RABBIT THAT JUMPS HIGH IN THE AIR - ESCAPES - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/177055.html

USAF KC-135 DOING FLYBY OF MOUNT RUSHMORE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177058.html

OLDE COCA COLA MARKETING SIGNS - CAMPAIGNS & VEHICLES - ST. MARC'S SQUARE - VENICE ITALY 1960'S - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/177769.html

SURFING DANGERS - AWESOME PICTURE OF SURFER IN THE CURL ZIPPING PAST PHOTOG! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178068.html

LINDA VAUGHN - MISS HURST SHIFTER - 1972 - 1 - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/178161.html

TAGGED! - THOSE GRAFFITI VANDALS ARE EVERYWHERE ! - ICEBERGS INCLUDED! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/178180.html

STRANGE CROWW SECTION DISPLAY OF HOW LUMBER YARDS CUT AND USE EVERY INCH OF A TREE LOG - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/178249.html

THE FINGER? A SUBTLE MESSAGE IN THE CLOUDS ABOUT THE HURRICANE ON THE EAST COAST! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178250.html

STRANGE CELEBRITY LUXURY BUSES AND TRAILERS - WILL SMITH - ARTICLE - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178005.html

SPORTS DANGERS - MOUNTAIN CLIMBING CHALLENGES - STRAIGHT UP FROZEN WATERFALL! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/178251.html

BICYCLE RACING DANGERS - HUGE MASSIVE PILEUP IN THE MIDDLE OF COUNTRY ROAD - RIDERS ALL OVER THE PLACE! - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/178252.html

CAR OR BOAT? - AMAZING COCKPIT SHOT OF DASHBOARD AND OVERHEAD CONSOLE WITH VIEW OF THE SUNSET OUT THE FRONT WINDSHIELD - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/178253.html

STRANGE RUSSIAN MAFIA TOMBSTONE - FULL SIZE STATUE - MARBLE COLUMNS ASSORTED ART AND STATUES WITH BENCH SEATING FOR MOURNERS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178254.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - ST - AUSTRALIA & NEW ZEALAND - Perth - Brisbane - Gold Coast - Kiwi's

http://www.strangetravel.com/content/category/100573_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

How Did We Get To This Godless Point? Stop This PC Madness! - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/177965.html

Strange Little Quiz Works Every Time ! - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/178211.html

Test for Dementia - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/25157.html

How Moral Are You? Personality Test - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/24433.html

Brain Teasers That Will Make You Groan - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/24092.html

Just How Sleazy Are You? Take the TEST - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/23361.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - ST - AUSTRALIA & NEW ZEALAND - Perth - Brisbane - Gold Coast - Kiwi's

http://www.strangetravel.com/content/category/112_1.html

==================================

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Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

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All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

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Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/

Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/

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VOL 1036 - Aug 24, 2011 - Aptronyms - Names That Match the Occupation

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com -

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Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

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VOL 1036 - Aug 24, 2011 - Aptronyms - Names That Match the Occupation

==================================

Strange "Food" Quotes:

A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch. - James A. Beard

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley, Jr.

Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me. - Sarah Bernhardt

Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are. - Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

Tomatoes and oregano make it Italian; wine and tarragon make it French. Sour cream makes it Russian; lemon and cinnamon make it Greek. Soy sauce makes it Chinese; garlic makes it good. - Alice May Brock

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat. - Jim Davis (Garfield)

Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs. - Dwight D. Eisenhower

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - - Aptronyms - Names That Match the Occupation

These are real APTRONYMS...
names that match the occupations.

Ray Ferrie is a retired ferryboat captain.

Linda Toot was the principal flute and William Basson was the bassoonist in the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra.

The current Florida Bar directory lists eight lawyers whose surname is "Law." They outnumber the Justices, of whom only four are listed. One Just. One Juster. Two Judges, neither of whom is a judge. One Council, but no Counsel.

Miss Cashdollar was the treasurer of a grade school.

Mr. Sues is a lawyer.

A soldier was spotted at a San Francisco military base with the nametag "Mankiller."

The 2001-2 Membership and Referral Directory of the American Urology Association includes 9 Dr. Peters, 11 Dr. Wang, 4 Dr. Wiener, 4 Dr. Cox, 1 Dr. Dick, 3 Dr. Philpott, 1 Dr. Urich, 1 Dr. John Thomas and 1 Dr. Insoft

Richard Seed is a pioneer of reproductive technology.

Cardinal Jaime Sin is former head of the Catholic Church in the Philippines.

Prof. Martin Braine is an American cognitive psychologist.

Prof. John Wisdom is an American philosopher.

Dr. Mishe Feinmesser (which means knife), is an Israeli surgeon.

Dr. Fingers is a well-know gynecologist in Australia.

Lake Speed is a NASCAR driver.

Dr. Dick Bone is an osteopath.

Patricia Feral is an animal rights activist in Stamford, CT.

A guy name Hooker runs a bait shop.

George Hammer used to own a hardware store in Louisville, KY. His son, Pete Hammer, now owns it.

The expert on deformed frogs (a problem in Minnesota) is Professor Hoppe of Southwest University of Minnesota.

In Maine, there is a veterinarian named Dr. Beever and a physician named Dr. DeKay.

Bruce Payne and David Swett are authors.

There is a law firm in California called Payne & Fears who represent employers in employment litigation.

At the British Guards Depot, the chief medical officer was a Captain Blood, his assistant was Lieutenant Butcher; the Dental Officer was a Major Savage.

Dr. I. Doctor, Eye Doctor, is an ophthalmologist.

There's a used car dealership was owned by Karl Krook.

At the Oscar Mayer plant in Madison, WI, the FED meat inspector is named Mr. Carrion.

Dr. Metzger is an orthopedic surgeon. The name translated from German means "butcher."

Jared Wooley raises sheep and Dr. Bone is an orthopedist in Buffalo, NY. Back in the '70s there were two urologists in Rochester, NY named Dr. Cocky and Dr. Wee.

Dr. David Toothaker is a dentist in Arkansas.

There is also a Dr. Coffin, Dr. Fearing, Dr. Sorrow, Dr. Pray and Dr. Death (pronounced Deeth) who should probably change his name or his profession.

And not to be outdone by Yanks, Bracebridge, Ontario, Canada, boasts of an optometrist named Gord Looker, an electrician named Bruce Sparks, a heating contractor named Mr. Freeze, a sawmill operator named Jordan Plank, and Jim Crook manages the local penitentiary while his assistant is Susan Penwarden.

Dr. Tom Fillar is a dentist.

Sir Russell Brain is a famous English neurologist.

Dr. Hertz was a dentist in Ft. Lauderdale.

Rev. D. Goodenough is a Methodist minister.

Roland Cruz is an auto mechanic.

Dr. Slaughter is an oral surgeon.

==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

CLASSIC OLDE CARS - 1965 FORD MUSTANG BERTONE EDITION - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/177667.html

STRANGE TOYS & GAMES - CHESS SETS - AFRICAN ANIMALS - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177027.html

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AMAZING SURFING PICTURES - OVER A DOZEN DOLPHINS CATCH HUGE WAVES AND SURF IN AS SURFERS SIT ON THEIR BOARDS AND ENJOY THE VIEW! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178066.html

VERY RARE & UNUSUAL WW II PHOTOS FOUND IN OLD SOLDIERS CAMERAS - JAPANESE KAWANISHI H8K - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/177114.html

WATER SPORTS DANGERS - WHITE WATER RAFTERS GO FLYING! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/177686.html

STRANGE FAST FOOD HOME DELIVERY BICYCLE - MCDONALDS! - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/177316.html

STRANGE VEHICLES - 1970 BUBBLE CAR - L'AUTOMODULE - 4 - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/177622.html

STRANGE MILITARY AIRCRAFT - ROMANIAN MIG - MIKOYAN - GURUVICH - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/177864.html

STRANGE MILITARY DEMONSTRATION 1920'S - ARMORED TANK JUMPING RAMP ON TO MODEL T FORD - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178092.html

STRANGE RAINBOW FORMED OVER TOP HUGE THUNDERHEAD CLOUD - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/178116.html

STRANGE 1940 CHEVY TRUCK NEW AND USED SALES LOT - MANY OPTIONS - STYLES AND VARIETIES! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178117.html

CLASSIC OLDE CARS - 1958 PACKARD CONCEPT - PREDICTA - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/177656.html

STRANGE COLLECTION OF NARWHALS GATHERED IN ICE OPENING - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/178118.html

BRITISH ROYALS VIEW WEDDING FLOWER ARRANGEMENTS DEPICTING THE ROYAL WEDDING - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178119.html

MEN - DON'T GO INTO THIS MEN'S BATHROOM IF YOU ARE SHY OR INSECURE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178120.html

STRANGE OLDE CELEBS - FRANK SINATRA AND JOHN F KENNEDY IN FORMAL WEAR - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/178121.html

STRANGE OPTICAL ILLUSION - STAR TREK'S CAPT PICARD - FACE PALM! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/178122.html

==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SS - BASEBALL - WORLD SERIES - ALL STAR GAME - PLAYERS

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/100019_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

24 Strange BrainTeasers - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/178124.html

Strange Odds and Polls - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/177095.html

Strange Fun Cat Facts - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/178125.html

Strange Armadillo Facts - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178126.html

Strange Hygiene Labels - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/178127.html

==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SS - BASEBALL - WORLD SERIES - ALL STAR GAME - PLAYERS

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/109_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites

Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/

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Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/

Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/

Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/

Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/

Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/

Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/

All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/

Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/

Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/

Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/

Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/

Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/

Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami's - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/

Golf - PGA Long Hitters - Hot LPGA Stars - Crazy Courses - http://www.strangegolf.com/

Medical - Strange Cures & Diseases - Medical Equipment http://www.strangemedical.com/

Videos - Action Gif's - PPS Presentations - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/

Vacations - Travel - Trips - http://www.strangevacations.com/

==========================

Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!

Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings

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