Vol 1171-A - Dec 07, 2012 - Special Edition - Dec 7, 1941 Japanese Attack Pearl Harbor

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A Special Tribute To Dec. 7, 1941 Japanese Sneak Attack On Pearl Harbor!

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Infamous FDR Dec. 7, 1941 Quote:

President Franklin D. Roosevelt: Yesterday, December 7, 1941, a date which will live in infamy, the United States Of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by Naval and Air Forces of the Empire of Japan. It is obvious that planning the attack began many weeks ago, during the intervening time the Japanese Government has deliberately sought to deceive the United States by false statements and expressions of hope for continued peace. The attack yesterday on the Hawaiian Islands has caused severe damage to American military forces, I regret to tell you that over three thousand American lives have been lost. No matter how long it may take us to over come this pre-meditated invasion, the American people in their righteous might will win through to absolute victory. Because of this unprovoked, dastardly attack by Japan, I ask that the congress declare a state of War.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Dec 7, 1941 Japanese Attack Pearl Harbor - Sequence of Events

Sequence of Events

Saturday, December 6 - Washington D.C. - U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt makes a final appeal to the Emperor of Japan for peace. There is no reply. Late this same day, the U.S. code-breaking service begins intercepting a 14-part Japanese message and deciphers the first 13 parts, passing them on to the President and Secretary of State. The Americans believe a Japanese attack is imminent, most likely somewhere in Southeast Asia.

Sunday, December 7 - Washington D.C. - The last part of the Japanese message, stating that diplomatic relations with the U.S. are to be broken off, reaches Washington in the morning and is decoded at approximately 9 a.m. About an hour later, another Japanese message is intercepted. It instructs the Japanese embassy to deliver the main message to the Americans at 1 p.m. The Americans realize this time corresponds with early morning time in Pearl Harbor, which is several hours behind. The U.S. War Department then sends out an alert but uses a commercial telegraph because radio contact with Hawaii is temporarily broken. Delays prevent the alert from arriving at headquarters in Oahu until noontime (Hawaii time) four hours after the attack has already begun.

Sunday, December 7 - Islands of Hawaii, near Oahu - The Japanese attack force under the command of Admiral Nagumo, consisting of six carriers with 423 planes, is about to attack. At 6 a.m., the first attack wave of 183 Japanese planes takes off from the carriers located 230 miles north of Oahu and heads for the U.S. Pacific Fleet at Pearl Harbor.

Pearl Harbor - At 7:02 a.m., two Army operators at Oahu's northern shore radar station detect the Japanese air attack approaching and contact a junior officer who disregards their reports, thinking they are American B-17 planes which are expected in from the U.S. west coast.

Near Oahu - At 7:15 a.m., a second attack wave of 167 planes takes off from the Japanese carriers and heads for Pearl Harbor.

Pearl Harbor is not on a state on high alert. Senior commanders have concluded, based on available intelligence, there is no reason to believe an attack is imminent. Aircraft are therefore left parked wingtip to wingtip on airfields, anti-aircraft guns are unmanned with many ammunition boxes kept locked in accordance with peacetime regulations. There are also no torpedo nets protecting the fleet anchorage. And since it is Sunday morning, many officers and crewmen are leisurely ashore.

At 7:53 a.m., the first Japanese assault wave, with 51 'Val' dive bombers, 40 'Kate' torpedo bombers, 50 high level bombers and 43 'Zero' fighters, commences the attack with flight commander, Mitsuo Fuchida, sounding the battle cry: "Tora! Tora! Tora!" (Tiger! Tiger! Tiger!).

The Americans are taken completely by surprise. The first attack wave targets airfields and battleships. The second wave targets other ships and shipyard facilities. The air raid lasts until 9:45 a.m. Eight battleships are damaged, with five sunk. Three light cruisers, three destroyers and three smaller vessels are lost along with 188 aircraft. The Japanese lose 27 planes and five midget submarines which attempted to penetrate the inner harbor and launch torpedoes.

Escaping damage from the attack are the prime targets, the three U.S. Pacific Fleet aircraft carriers, Lexington, Enterprise and Saratoga, which were not in the port. Also escaping damage are the base fuel tanks.

The casualty list includes 2,335 servicemen and 68 civilians killed, with 1,178 wounded. Included are 1,104 men aboard the Battleship USS Arizona killed after a 1,760-pound air bomb penetrated into the forward magazine causing catastrophic explosions.

In Washington, various delays prevent the Japanese diplomats from presenting their war message to Secretary of State, Cordell Hull, until 2:30 p.m. (Washington time) just as the first reports of the air raid at Pearl Harbor are being read by Hull.

News of the "sneak attack" is broadcast to the American public via radio bulletins, with many popular Sunday afternoon entertainment programs being interrupted. The news sends a shockwave across the nation and results in a tremendous influx of young volunteers into the U.S. armed forces. The attack also unites the nation behind the President and effectively ends isolationist sentiment in the country.

Monday, December 8 - The United States and Britain declare war on Japan with President Roosevelt calling December 7, "a date which will live in infamy..."

Thursday, December 11 - Germany and Italy declare war on the United States. The European and Southeast Asian wars have now become a global conflict with the Axis powers; Japan, Germany and Italy, united against America, Britain, France, and their Allies.

Wednesday, December 17 - Admiral Chester W. Nimitz becomes the new commander of the U.S. Pacific Fleet.

Both senior commanders at Pearl Harbor; Navy Admiral Husband E. Kimmel, and Army Lt. General Walter C. Short, were relieved of their duties following the attack. Subsequent investigations will fault the men for failing to adopt adequate defense measures.


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Vol 1170 - Dec 05, 2012 - Strange Zen Sarcasm

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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December Fun !


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Strange Quotes: When Insults Had Class

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." -- John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -- Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -- Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." -- Paul Keating

"He had delusions of adequacy." -- Walter Kerr

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -- Mark Twain

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -- Oscar Wilde

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Strange Zen Sarcasm


1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.


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VOL 1169 - Dec 02, 2012 - Strange Regional Differences - Planning For The Football Season in the North & South

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Strange "Business" Quotes:

"When you need to knock on wood is when you realize the world's composed of aluminum and vinyl." [Flugg]

"If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then add one more as an afterthought, he'll forget two of the first five." [Wives]

"Keep up with the Grabowskis . . . you'll never make enough to keep up with the Joneses." [Advice on Status]

"Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day's work."

"The dirt is also on the other side." [Frisk Principle of Window Cleaning]

"When all else fails, why not read the instructions?"

"We should refrain from making very harsh judgments of people just because they happen to be dirty, no-good s.o.b.s."


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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Planning For The Football Season in the North & South

Planning for the fall football season in the South is radically different than up North. For those who are planning a football trip to the South, here are some helpful hints.


Women's Accessories


NORTH: ChapStick in back pocket and a $20 bill in the front pocket.

SOUTH: Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of bourbon. Money not necessary - that's what dates are for.


Stadium Size


NORTH: College football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

SOUTH: High school football stadiums hold 20,000 people.


Fathers


NORTH: Expect their daughters to understand Sylvia Plath.

SOUTH: Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.


Campus Decor


NORTH: Statues of founding fathers.

SOUTH: Statues of Heisman trophy winners.


Homecoming Queen


NORTH: Also a physics major.

SOUTH: Also Miss America.


Heroes


NORTH: Rudy Giuliani

SOUTH: Bear Bryant, Archie, Eli and Peyton Manning, Bo Jackson


Getting Tickets


NORTH: 5 days before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus and purchase tickets.

SOUTH: 5 months before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus and put name on waiting list for tickets.


Monday Classes After a Saturday Game


NORTH: Students and teachers not sure they're going to the game, because they have to prepare for classes on Monday.

SOUTH: Teachers cancel Monday classes because they don't want to see the few hung over students that might actually make it to class.


Parking


NORTH: An hour before game time, the University opens the campus for game parking.

SOUTH: RVs sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend festivities. The really faithful arrive on Tuesday.


Game Day


NORTH: A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.

SOUTH: Every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting "Game Day Live" to get on camera and wave to the idiots up north who wonder why "Game Day Live" is never broadcast from their campus.


Tailgating


NORTH: Raw meat on a grill, beer with lime in it, listening to local radio station with truck tailgate down.

SOUTH: 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance by "Dave Matthews' Band," who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off bottle of bourbon.


Getting to the Stadium


NORTH: You ask "Where's the stadium?" When you find it, you walk right in.

SOUTH: When you're near it, you'll hear it. On game day it becomes the state's third largest city.


Concessions


NORTH: Drinks served in a paper cup, filled to the top with soda.

SOUTH: Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the home team's mascot on it, filled less than half way with soda, to ensure enough room for bourbon.


When National Anthem is Played


NORTH! : Stands are less than half full, and less than half of them stand up.

SOUTH: 100,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony.


The Smell in the Air After the First Score


NORTH: Nothing changes.

SOUTH: Fireworks, with a touch of bourbon.


Commentary (Male)


NORTH: "Nice play."

SOUTH: "Dammit, you slow sumbitch - tackle him and break his legs.."


Commentary (Female)


NORTH: "My, this certainly is a violent sport."

SOUTH: "Dammit, you slow sumbitch tackle him and break his legs."


Announcers


NORTH: Neutral and paid.

SOUTH: Announcer harmonizes with the crowd in the fight song, with a tear in his eye because he is so proud of his team.


After the Game


NORTH: The stadium is empty way before the game ends.

SOUTH: Another rack of ribs goes on the smoker, while somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, and planning begins for next week's game.


Nothing else in the universe comes even halfway close to the glories of Southern football!


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The Featured Pix Category This Week - SZ - PET CEMETERIES - PET TOMBSTONES - ANIMAL GRAVES

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/101121_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

Strange David Feherty Golf Quotes - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/185958.html


Strange "Romantic" Poems - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/113978.html


Strange and Outrageous Celebrity Demands - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/184122.html


Strange Sayings That Should be on Buttons - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/120726.html


The Classic List of "How Many ? to Change a Light Bulb????????? - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/120728.html


Strange Actual Newspaper Headlines - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/119815.html


==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SZ - PET CEMETERIES - PET TOMBSTONES - ANIMAL GRAVES

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/category/108_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites


Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

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VOL 1167 - Nov 25, 2012 - 75 Profound But Really Strange Questions

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/20660.html

[b3ta] "Self-regulating since 2001 and we have tissues to prove it"

 

This Week:
* LOCKERS - London-wide advent calendar
* PLANNING - Spoof signs
* TINY - Meal made from powders

-------------------------------------------------
________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "11yrs of procrastination
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | distilled into one
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| handy newsletter"

B3ta email 557 - 30 Nov 2012

Go on an HTML adventure into cyberland:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue557

ACK : b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
NAK : b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

-------------------------------------------------

: BUY SOME GREAT CHARGRILLED T SHIRTS
Buy 3 get 1 free deal (Sponsored links)

Stuck for present ideas this year? Your dad will
love a "I'm a grumpy old git" T Shirt. Your mum?
She'd die for "10 Reasons Why Men Are Lazy" T Shirt.
Go on - cause offense this Christmas
Buy everyone CharGrilled T shirts.
ALSO QUOTE B3TA10 for extra 10% off.
http://www.chargrilled.co.uk/

>> Sponsor B3ta <<
Want this space? Buy our very reasonably priced
ads.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
Advent calendar, Britishness and video games

>> Amazon Locker Advent calendar <<
"I'm doing a thing with Amazon Lockers, although
it might be a bit London-centric," confesses Tom
Scott. "Every day December 1st–24th, we'll
announce a code to get into an Amazon Locker in
London. First one there wins whatever's inside.
It might be something simple like a Christmas
decoration, a trinket, or some chocolate. But
sometimes, it'll be something big: a toy, good
books... or maybe even an iPod."
http://adventlocker.com

>> Professor Elemental - I'm British <<
"Hello there you lovely folks," chuffs Moog.
"I've done another video for Professor
Elemental. Perhaps you might like this new one
for the song, I'm British. Chin chin!"
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Professor_Elemental_Im_British

>> Wasted My Time Playing Video Games <<
"This video is from a few years ago," confesses
superpowerless. "But now it's in HD and
Widescreen with a new mix of the song."
Relentlessly inventive vid is definitely worth a
watch.
http://bit.ly/UfA7rn

--------------------------------------------

: THINK YOU KNOW GRAN TURISMO? THINK AGAIN
Download the book (sponsored link)

GTPEDIA is the ultimate, unauthorized
encyclopedia of every game in the GRAN TURISMO®
series.

With over 375 pages of extensive car lists,
track lists, and highly detailed event
overviews, it is the single most comprehensive
and thorough GT resource ever compiled.

Packed with trivia, GTPEDIA will fascinate and
entertain even the most dedicated fans of the
series. If you think you know Gran Turismo,
think again!
http://www.gtplanet.net/gtpedia/

-------------------------------------------------

: QUESTION OF THE WEEK
Internet Crazies

We wanted to know all about the crazy people
you've met through the internet. Go read the
poem sent to grandmasterfluffles by Archie "Mr
Poet" Moses:
http://b3ta.com/questions/internetcrazies/

* SHOWER - "Advertising for a housemate on
Gumtree resulted in one bloke who came around,
looked about the flat a bit and then asked if he
could try the shower. I thought, "fair enough,
it's an important part of your morning routine."
I stood by while he spent a full five minutes by
the bath, shower head in hand, messing with the
temperature, trying the different settings, etc.
with a look of real concentration on his face.
He emailed back the next day and said he might
be interested, but he wasn't sure. Could he come
back and have another look at the shower?"
(SnowyTheRabbit)

* PUMP - "After weaning her daughter, my
flat-mate decided to get rid of her electric
breast pump, so she put it up on Freecycle. She
was contacted by a man who asked many sensible,
intelligent questions about the machine - it was
clearly something he knew a lot about. Having
satisfied himself that it was the type he
wanted, he said he'd like to have it. "Will it
be yourself or your partner that will be
collecting it?" asked my flatmate. "Oh, it's not
for a partner, it's for me," he replied." (moon
monkey)

* COCK - "My studies of chatroulette have led me
to conclude that the average man on the street,
given anonymity, would by choice either flash
his cock or idly masturbate when meeting you for
the first time." (cumquat may)

>> This Week - NO SELF AWARENESS <<
This week we want your stories of people
blissfully unaware of their bad smells, bad
manners and foghorn voices. Tell all:
http://b3ta.com/questions/noselfawareness/

-------------------------------------------------

: AMAZON TAT
Because Amazon knows trolling sells product

* PRODUCT ERRORS - Dear Amazon, a small
complaint. This is not a "luxurious christmas
pudding" but a photo of Ainsley Harriott on a
mug. Actually is there something vaguely racist
about calling Harriot a "luxurious christmas
pudding"? Perhaps how he'd be described on an
escort website.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B009633Q4O/b3ta-21

* VIBRATOR AND DOG BASKET GIFT SET -
Inexplicably linked. Best review? "The vibrator
is great for keeping the wife out of my hair,
but she really resents having to sleep in a dog
bed."
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B007QGDKBW/b3ta-20

* METHS - street drinkers still drink meths?
Seems a bit 70s to us, but the reviews are fun:
"From the moment you remove the cap you realise
you're in for a treat. Fresh, bright, smoky,
with a mineral edge and rounded, fruity nose.
Midweight and bold, possessing some edge and no
little bite, yet remaining smooth, balanced and
satisfying. This is a drink to enjoy with
friends in a park. Highly recommended."
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B002ATI4VG/b3ta-21

-------------------------------------------------

: SITES IN BRIEF
Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates

>> Fake planning notices <<
English humour at its finest, some Brightonian
is writing, printing and putting up these spoof
planning application notices.
http://bit.ly/SyA2iG

>> Convince yourself you're half-blind colour-wise <<
Colour-vision test that has you arrange squares
in order of hue. Harder than it might first
appear - you might be surprised at what you're
missing. (Cue 1,000 emails from nerds bragging
of a perfect score).
http://www.xrite.com/custom_page.aspx?pageid=77&lang=en

>> Funny crafting fails <<
Home hobbyists try to recreate lovely craft
stuff they've seen online. We should point out
that loads of these pics are from craftfail.com
but boredpanda has chucked a lot of them onto a
more easily-linkable page.
http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-pinterest-fails/

>> Bad kids' jokes <<
Bloke who edits a site for kid-submitted jokes,
also blogs the ones that were slightly too
offensive for the main site. Surreal, schoolyard
naughtiness.
http://badkidsjokes.tumblr.com/

>> Dan! Dan! Dan! <<
Alan Partridge on a loop. Cringe.
http://dandandan.net/

>> Semi-Automatic Gmail Assistant <<
A safekey-restricted Gmail responder that sends
"Go F*** Yourself!" messages as a response to
unwanted emails. Although there is a 1% chance
that SAGA will instead respond "That's a Great
idea, I'll get right on it!"
http://etsy.me/10aRu0m

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK #2
Apocalypse calendar, Magic, Gameshow & Monkeys

>> Clockalypse <<
As you may be aware, if everything works
according to schedule, the world will be ending
on December 21st. "It seemed pointless sending
out Christmas cards this year," points out Dave
Birss. "So instead we created the Clockalypse -
a countdown clock that gives people suggestions
to make the most of their remaining breaths. If
the Mayans were wrong, Happy Christmas to you.
If not, enjoy the short time you've got left."
http://clockalypse.com/

>> Mr. Magic's flying secrets <<
Mr. Magic blows the lid off the world of
big-time illusionists, then saws it in half,
then pulls an egg from its ear. Weareace shows
you how to achieve mind-bending special effects.
http://b3ta.com/links/896241

>> Cheeky Flippin Nice gameshow <<
"We grabbed two people from Kentish Town high
street and took them down to a basement," grunts
Pig Face Turnip. "Here's what happened."
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Cheeky_Flippin_Nice_Gameshow

>> Very short monkey documentary <<
Not a film about short monkeys, but genuine
slice of fact-based interest about 19th Century
Russian scientists and cross-breeding with
chimps. "It's a video about monkeys," clarifies
BobbyDaveHead. "Monkeys are awesome."
http://b3ta.com/links/889999

-------------------------------------------------

: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Flickbooks now have sound!

>> Extremely tiny meal <<
Almost like an unboxing video, here's a
demonstration of how to combine various powder
sachets and water into an extraordinary, edible
miniature of actual food.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8gJOCwBuFc

>> Hot Chip FIFA video <<
"B3ta, did you see my new vid?" asks King of
Twitter Peter Serafinowicz, who has directed
another peculiar video for Hot Chip. Highly odd.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gf3bmQh8_dM

>> Africans donating radiators to Norway. <<
Charity song to encourage Africans to raise a
little heat for the less fortunate in Norway.
Obviously, it's more making a point about how
Africa is frequently depicted in charity appeals
and the media.
http://www.africafornorway.no/

>> Mom is a maniac on the drums <<
Woman baffles internet by overcoming the twin
handicaps of being both female and middle-aged
to play a musical instrument rather well. It is
funny, though, to see someone in a pink polo
shirt get quite so into Wipe Out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GWSJR2pL46M

>> Best bits of cuntish editor <<
Supercut of horrific, yet marginally believable,
Hoxton new media twat Jonatton Yeah? from Nathan
Barley. We got lost in this and now feel an urge
to watch the whole series again wondering if
some of the jokes vaguely referenced b3ta? The
"Terrorists are gay" bit made us squirm at the
time anyway.
&#8207;http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYBAlqVTZjM

-------------------------------------------------

: FUNNY NAME CORNER
Still shit and we weep for publishing it

* ATTRACTIVE LADY WITH MASTURBATORY NAME -
norval.scott writes, "Been sniggering over this
at work for half an hour. Clearly I need to get
out more. Still - for funny name corner -
Slovakian model, Ivana Vancova" The producers of
Bond should use her in their next movie -
slightly iffy publicity galore.
- http://www.supermodels.nl/ivanavancova

* DOG PENIS - imagine if you were born a dog
with an image of a penis on your back - spinning
eternally trying to hump yourself.
http://imgur.com/gallery/FxjNX

* BEST GYNECOLOGIST NAME EVER - we give you
Harry C Beaver.
https://www.google.com/search?q=dr+harry+beaver

-------------------------------------------------

: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Results from the Animal Tech Challenge

Last week we wanted you to add technology
to animals. Your favourites included:

* SHARK: including improved jet engine
action, albeit with decreased vision
(HumanDescent)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10886100

* MOUSE: household rodent goes space-age,
in space (E Dubya)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10885603

* SEAGULL: splatter bonanza as seaside
pest meets arcade classic (monkeon)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/10887329

All these images, and the highest as voted by
you can be found here:
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/cyber-toothed-tigers/

>> New challenge: Real Life Movie Posters <<
Lights, camera, action! This week's
challenge is to re-create a famous movie
poster using a single, posed photograph.
Like this amazing example. Challenge
suggested by HappyToast
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/real-life-movie-posters/

-------------------------------------------------

: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Follow-ups on previous stories.

* TEA THAT DOESN'T MAKE YOU NEED TO WEE -
ben.broomfield writes, "It's the caffeine in tea
acting as a diuretic, making you want to open
the floodgates. I can suggest Redbush tea which
is caffeine-free. You can have with milk, and
doesn't taste like shit. However, if you've had
five cups, it just depends on how strong your
bladder is..."

* COMPLAINTS - davidnbashore writes, "Your
posting of 'Leaked White House tape' was the
most disrespectful, uncalled-for,
Republican-approved bullshit I've ever seen on
this site, and I've been a subscriber for years.
Well, now I'mm an unsubscriber. Fuck you limey
cunts. You're just jealous of our democracy." So
true. B3ta; Republican supporters and jealous of
America's democracy. Nailed us there.

* EBOOK COVERS - chazz writes, "The Kobo sets
its display to the last-read book cover when it
goes to sleep or turns off." Great idea - Kindle
should nick this pronto.

-------------------------------------------------

: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

Make something cool and tell us about it. If
you are in it then people will see your stuff.

Things we'd really like to see include:

* UNFAIL ANTI-LOLS - compile a video of your
favourite "unfails". Riding a bike and not
falling off. Walking down road not tripping up
etc.

* WASHING-MACHINE TV CHANNEL - an alternative to
Cbeebies and just as entertaining for small
children. Or at least it entertains ours.

* THE DEATH OF ALL LIVING THINGS - we've just
done the winter clear on the garden: 13 black
bin-liners full of leaves and twigs. FFS nature!

Send contributions via the mail form.
http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
been featured then don't be put off - we look
at everything you send us.

-------------------------------------------------

Subs: b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Blubs: b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

-------------------------------------------------

THANKS:
This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
Stevenson. Stuff sent in by badgerlikespeed,
@tomirwin_tw, @martin_gleeson, Araucaria,
Martyn.hood, nospoon, Fork, omnitruncatedkraken,
Gruffi Savalas, @reubenturner, &#8207;@erocdrahs,
@dancall1, &#8207;@idrinktea, weegiegeek & i.caple.
Image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder is
QOTW bloke. Tip by sandettie light vessel
automatic. Subjlols via Pootle.

-------------------------------------------------

TOP TIP:
Instead of spending good money on anti-ageing
creams and treatment, travel at the speed of
light for a bit. That way when you stop again,
everyone will have aged considerably more than
you will have and you can enjoy the admiring
gasps of your friends.

TOP TIP 2:
Need Christmas gift ideas, but no money? Convert
a lightbulb into an attracti... a quirky vase.
(Created by Dave Haxworth)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3yx8Apr_fJg

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VOL 1168 - Nov 28, 2012 - Just How Dumb Are You Quiz

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

---------------------------------------

November Fun !


------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

------------------------

NEW FEATURE NOW AVAILABLE ON STRANGE WEBSITES - THE MOST POPULAR GROUP TOPICS/PICTURES OF THE WEEK - 30 Pictures Per Group:

http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/news_8702.html
HOLLYWOOD STARS ENTERTAIN THE TROOPS USO - VIETNAM - KOREA - WWII

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/news_11044.html
STRANGE LONG PICTURE SERIES - WEIRDNESS FROM AROUND THE WORLD! - 1

http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/news_10322.html
STRANGE MILITARY SEAPLANES - WWI - WWI - KOREA - TODAY

http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/news_9023.html
NEW - STRANGE OLDE INVENTIONS & DEVICES FROM THE 1900's

http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/news_1817.html
STRANGE BARS - PUBS - TAVERNS - RESTAURANTS AROUND THE WORLD

==================================

Strange Quotes About Food:

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish. - Timothy Jones

"Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch." &#8213; Orson Welles

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead. - Woody Allen

There are five elements: earth, air, fire, water and garlic. - Louis Diat

$ex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. - Garrison Keillor

"Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It's a grain. It's like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem." &#8213; James Patterson

There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who love chocolate, and communists. - Leslie Moak Murray in "Murray's Law"

"Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart." &#8213; Erma Bombeck

==================================

Today's Featured Humor : -) - - Just How Dumb Are You Quiz

1. What do you put in a toaster?

The answer is bread. If you said "toast", then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread", go to question 2.


2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk". What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously overstressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate such ! as "Children's World". If you said, "water" then proceed to question three.


3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks", what the heck are you still doing here reading these questions? If you said "glass", then go on to question four.


4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury! the survivors - East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?
Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.


5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every minute then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour? Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree", you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room. Everyone else proceed to the final question.


6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, th! ree people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for heaven sake! It was YOU, Read the first line!!!


==================================

Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix

==================================

STRANGE OLDE FRENCH LIMOUSINE - THE TRIPLES BERLINE - 1910 - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/185846.html


BEFORE & AFTER AERIAL PHOTOS OF HURRICANE SANDY SHORE DAMAGE - SEASIDE HEIGHTS, NEW JERSEY - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/185879.html


CAT UP ON CABINET KNOCKS OVER TV AS OWNER TRIES TO DO SIT-UPS! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/178138.html


STRANGE OLDE PENNY ARCADE MACHINES AND EQUIPMENT - DUAL RACE CAR DRIVERS - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/186006.html


STRANGE OLDE PENNY ARCADE MACHINES AND EQUIPMENT - BASEBALL - SWAT THE PITCH - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/186010.html


HOT EMMA BUNTON - SEXY STRIPED BIKINI - DIAMOND STUDDED BELLY BUTTON JEWELRY - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/186035.html


STRANGE OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - ALBERT EINSTEIN 3-D FACE SPINNING! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/186051.html


STRANGE MAPS AND CHARTS - AMERICAN INDIAN LAND CLAIMS SINCE 1784 TO TODAY - ACTION GIF - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/186052.html


STRANGE OFFICE FURNITURE - RED BULL SHIPPING OFFICE HAS AIRPLANE WING AS DESK FOR PILOT! - AIRPLANES PAINTED ON WALLS. - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/186053.html


SARAH JESSICA PARKER IN YOGA PANTS - NEEEEE! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/186054.html


STRANGE FINGER PAINT ARTWORK - AMAZING WALL CREATIONS AND PATTERNS! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/186055.html


STRANGE COLLAGE OF RUSSIAN NUCLEAR SUBMARINES - OVER A DOZEN DETAILED PICTURES OF SUBS IN ACTION AND DRYDOCK - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/186056.html


STRANGE GM CONCEPT CARS - 1954-56-58 FIREBIRDS - ROCKET SHAPED! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/186058.html


STRANGE USE OF THE FAMOUS HOCKEY AWARD THE STANLEY CUP - USED AS A BREAKFAST CEREAL BOWL! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/186057.html


STRANGE OLDE POLICE MUG SHOT AND BOOKING CARD - BAD GIRLS - 1945 - RITA - DISORDERLY CONDUCT! - http://www.strangepolice.com/content/item/186059.html


STRANGE BOLIVIAN SPEED BUMP - HUGE BOA CONSTRICTOR CROSSING THE ROAD! - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/186060.html


STRANGE OLDE FARM EQUIPMENT - PORSCHE FARM TRACTOR - COVERED WHEELS - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/186061.html


STRANGE GROWN UP VERSION - BIG SCALE - TEAR DROP CAMPER - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/186062.html


==================================

The Featured Pix Category This Week - SS - MOTORCYCLE RACING - OVALS - DIRT BIKES

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/100029_1.html

==================================

The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week

- The True Meaning of the Word 'Service!' - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/24894.html


Strange Random Sports Facts - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/161398.html


Creative Puns for Creative Minds - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/160484.html


Strange Phobias - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/160850.html


Strange Facts About Volkswagens - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/160851.html


Strange Inventions - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/160170.html


==================================

The Featured New Category This Week - SS - MOTORCYCLE RACING - OVALS - DIRT BIKES

http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/115_1.html

==================================

Be Sure to Check Out All the "Strange" Family Websites


Visit Often - Tell Your Friends - Never Follow!

#1 Stranger

---------------------

HOTEL ROOMS BOOKED AND THE LOWEST RATE! - GUARANTEED!


Over 1 Million Rooms & Suites Booked - Amazing Savings


http://www.reservetravel.com/v5/redir.aspx?&type=search&siteid=9055

------------------------


Remove E-mail Address - http://www.strangecosmos.com/static/unsubscribe.html

VOL 1167 - Nov 25, 2012 - 75 Profound But Really Strange Questions

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/20660.html

VOL 1167 - Nov 25, 2012 - 75 Profound But Really Strange Questions

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

---------------------------------------

Thanksgivings Weekend Fun !


------------------------

Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

------------------------

NEW FEATURE NOW AVAILABLE ON STRANGE WEBSITES - THE MOST POPULAR GROUP TOPICS/PICTURES OF THE WEEK - 30 Pictures Per Group:

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/news_9053.html
STRANGE PET CEMETERIES & TOMBSTONES

http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/news_8100.html
RALLY CARS & TRUCKS - WHEELS OFF THE GROUND!

http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/news_10053.html
DOGS TAKING A RIDE - ON MOTORCYCLE AND IN CARS AND TRUCKS!

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Strange Quotes of The Day:

"The telephone company is urging people to please not use the telephone unless it is absolutely necessary in order to keep the lines open for emergency personnel. We'll be right back after this break to give away a pair of Phil Collins tickets to caller number 95." - Los Angeles d. j. (after the February 1990 earthquake)

"Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock." - Ben Hecht

"Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones was alive." - G. K. Chesterton

"I used to be Snow White, but I drifted." - Mae West

"I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean." - G. K. Chesterton

"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues." - Abraham Lincoln

"Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell." - Anonymous

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - 75 Profound But Really Strange Questions

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If a candle factory burns down, does everyone just stand around and sing "Happy Birthday?"

If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?

If a food processor slices and dices food, what does a word processor do?

If a hen and a half can lay an egg and a half in a day and a half, how long would it take a monkey with a wooden leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? --Tom Robbins

If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?

If a mime commits suicide, does he use a silencer? --Steven Wright

If a mirror reverses right and left, why doesn't it reverse up and down? (Thanks, Robert A. Hinds)

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a picture of a thousand words worth?

If a pig is sold to the pawn shop, is it a ham-hock?

If a pizza place sells pizza by the slice, is there a guy in the back tossing a triangle in the air? --Steven Wright

If a pronoun is a word used in place of a noun, is a proverb a word used in place of a verb?

If a tree falls in the forest, does the earth scream out in pain?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure? --Harry Shearer

For ALL 75 of the questions go here:

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/20660.html

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VOL 1167 - Nov 25, 2012 - 75 Profound But Really Strange Questions

http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/20660.html

VOL 1166 - Nov 21, 2012 - Actual SAT Test Answers in Arkansas

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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Thanksgivings Day Fun !


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Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet?

Get ready to jump into something "Strange!"

http://www.strangecosmos.com/index.html

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NEW FEATURE NOW AVAILABLE ON STRANGE WEBSITES - THE MOST POPULAR GROUP TOPICS/PICTURES OF THE WEEK - 30 Pictures Per Group:

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QUOTES & TOASTS of the DAY - TURKEY DAY TOASTS!!!!

A Toast for Friends & Family

Here's to friends both near and far:
Here's to woman, man's guiding star:
Here's to friends we've yet to meet,
Here's to those here: all here I greet:
Here's to childhood, youth, old age,
Here's to prophet, bard and sage,
Here's to health to every one,
Peace on earth, and heaven won!
-------------------
"Real abundance is found when we join hands with those we love." anon

Thanksgiving Day is a jewel, to set in the hearts of honest men; but be careful that you do not take the day, and leave out the gratitude. - E.P. Powell

We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing. - George Carlin

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. - Erma Bombeck

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Thanksgiving & Turkey Trivia

* The first Thanksgiving celebration lasted three days.

* The Wampanoag chief invited to the first Thanksgiving feast was named Massasoit.

* The Pilgrims didn't use forks.

* Only about one-third of the original colonists were Puritans.

* The Mayflower's crossing took 66 days.

* It's unclear if the Pilgrims at turkey at the first Thanksgiving. At the time, "turkey" meant any kind of fowl.

* Evidence indicates that turkeys have been around for more than 10 million years.

* Turkey eggs hatch in 28 days.

* A baby turkey is called a "poult."

* A mature turkey has about 3,500 feathers.

* More than 45 million turkeys are consumed during Thanksgiving.

* The average weight of a Thanksgiving turkey is 15 pounds.

* The Mayflower weighed 180 tons.

* There were at least two dogs on the Mayflower.

* The typical 15-pound turkey is 70 percent white meat and 30
percent dark meat.

* Pilgrim children, boys and girls, wore linen or wool dresses up until the ages of seven or eight.

* Cranberries are also called "bounceberries."

* A male turkey is called a "Tom." A female turkey is called a "hen."

* The Mayflower was a merchant vessel. Before transporting the Pilgrims, the ship was in the wine trade, and before that, in the fish trade.

* The pet food industry uses about 13 percent of U.S. turkey production.

* The Pilgrims did not eat cranberry sauce at the first Thanksgiving.

* In the typical Pilgrim household, adults sat down to dinner while
the children waited on them.

* A nest of turkey eggs is called a "clutch."

* The "caruncle" is the reddish, fleshy growth on the head and upper neck of a turkey. The red, fleshy growth from the base of a turkey's
beak that hangs down over the neck is called the "snood."

* The first native Americans to introduce themselves to the Pilgrims were Samoset and Squanto.

* Ninety-five percent of Americans eat turkey on Thanksgiving.



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