Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike: Vol 862 - Dec. 23, 2009 - Top Ten Things A Department Store Santa Doesn't Want To Hear From Kids

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MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

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Top 10 Christmas Quotes:

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree is the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. - Burton Hillis

The only blind person at Christmastime is he who has not Christmas in his heart. - Helen Keller

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space. - Dave Barry

Christmas, my child, is love in action. Every time we love, every time we give, it's Christmas. -Dale Evans Rogers

This, the spirit of Christmas, that forever and ever endures. May it leave its richest blessing in the hearts of you and yours. - Author Unknown

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year. - Victor Borge

Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. - Larry Wilde

From home to home, and heart to heart, from one place to another. The warmth and joy of Christmas brings us closer to each other. - Emily Matthews

The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of Christmas. - WC Jones

Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles.

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - Top Ten Things A Department Store Santa Doesn't Want To Hear From Kids

10. "Remember me? I'm the kid with the weak bladder"

9. "You smell like supermarket gin"

8. "The real miracle on 34th Street would be if they accepted my mom's MasterCard"

7. "I want a 2004 Pontiac Aztec"

6. "Oh, by the way, if I don't get an X-Box, I'm gonna hunt you down, old man"

5. "I'm Jewish"

4. "I love you Kenny Rogers"

3. "Frankly I'm just here to humor my parents"

2. "While I'm talking to you, my mom is shoplifting blouses"

1. "Mom says you're my real daddy"

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Phun Stuff and Everything You Dislike

Mittwoch, 23. Dezember 2009

Vol 862 - Dec. 23, 2009 - Top Ten Things A Department Store Santa Doesn't Want To Hear From Kids

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