VOL 1426 - MAY 17, 2015 - 19 Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn

Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - This Week's Feature:

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STRANGE MAY FUN!

Time For Some Strange Fun !


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STRANGE LONG PICTURE SERIES - WEIRDNESS FROM AROUND THE WORLD!

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STRANGE " MOVIE THEME" COSTUMED DOGS - FROM SILENCE OF THE LAMBS TO STARWARS AND PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN

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Strange "Animal" Quotes:

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too. - Samuel Butler

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them. - Samuel Butler

I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It's not. Mine had me trained in two days. - Bill Dana (William Szathmary)

"Moo" may represent an idea, but only the cow knows. - Mason Cooley "City Aphorisms"

Sacred cows make the tastiest hamburger. - Abbie Hoffman

A horse is dangerous at both ends and uncomfortable in the middle. - Ian Fleming

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Today's Featured Humor : -) - - 19 Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn

NINETEEN THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME 50 YEARS TO LEARN

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.

6. You should not confuse your career with your life.

7. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.

8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.

9. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

10. Never lick a steak knife.

11. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.

12. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

13. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

14. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

15. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

16. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them.

18. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

19. Your friends love you anyway.


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